Jimmy Fallon Goes to Bayside High! Saved by the Bell Cast Reunites - VIDEO

Friends forever, bitches!!!

Last night the never-aging cast of Saved by the Bell joined forces with Jimmy Fallon on The Tonight Show to re-create a few memorable moments from the epic 90s Saturday morning staple and it was just as super fucking awesome as it sounds.

Zack Morris, Kelly Kapowski, AC Slater and Jessie Spano all showed up in a pre-filmed 8 min skit with the late night jokester complete with bigass cellular phones the size of a brick and a shout out to Jessie Spano's super stupid one-ep caffeine addiction when she got too damn excited lol...

Bitchin'.

Check it out >



DAMN!  Belding got big yo!  

Noticeably missing were Lisa Turtle and Samuel "Screech" Powers.  Lark Voorhies hasn't commented on missing out on the reunion and it seems like Screech is still in trouble after stabbing some dude in a bar.

Time out.  What the hell?

Allegedly Screech got all stab happy at a bar on Christmas Day (classy) and injured a man who was pissed off that Screech wouldn't shake his woman's hand.  He was charged with second-degree recklessly endangering safety, disorderly conduct and carrying a concealed weapon and is still dealing with the court case.  He had also had major fall out with the cast since writing a tell all slash making an unauthorized flick which basically condemned them all as a bunch of horny jerks who bullied him so maybe they just weren't interested in working with his porn-making ass again.

Anywho, well done Fallon!  Only thing that could've made it better is if Johnny Dakota would've stopped by looking a hot Lindsay Lohan mess because "there's no hope with dope."

That or the ghost of Becky the duck.

Image Via www.youtube.com

Donald Trump Might Sue Bill Maher for Telling a Joke on Leno - VIDEO

Ooooh!  There's going to be hell toupee now!  See what I did there?!?!  

Here's what went down >

Maher was on Leno a couple of nights ago (I watched it - he insulted Snooki and JWoww- it was pretty awesome) and during the show he cracked that Trump and his hair were the "spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan."  We all laughed and the world kept spinnin'.  It was a non-event.  A joke on a late night talk show.

But aye!  Apparently not everyone was laughing...This made Trump mad!  You wouldn't like him when he's mad, Bill!  He turns into this litigious monster with a combover and a twitter account.  It's pretty fucking scary.

As expected, Trump's ass got into a sue-happy knot, he got off of twitter, wiped the little girl tears from his eyes and sent a copy of his birth certificate to Maher's people along with a note of demand tout suite!

Attached hereto is a copy of Mr. Trump's birth certificate, demonstrating that he is the son of Fred Trump, not an orangutan. Please remit the $5 million to Mr. Trump immediately and he will ensure that the money be donated to the following five charities in equal amounts: Hurricane Sandy Victims, The Police Athletic League, The American Cancer Society, The March of Dimes, and The Dana-Farber Cancer Institute. (Excerpt)

Combover McScrooge says that if Maher doesn't pay up, he's gonna (big shock here) SUE!!!  

What a little bitch...

As of right now, Maher isn't playing his reindeer games but he has time to respond.  Pretty sure he won't but it will be hilarious if he does!  Guy's got panache, yo!

Image Via www.youtube.com

Video of the Day! Al Roker Shit his Pants at the White House

Now...lemme start by saying this is not a video of Al Roker actually shitting himself at the White House.  I just sort of liked that post title!

Let me also iterate that homey had recently undergone gastric bypass surgery and apparently this is a side effect.  (Because I ain't tryin' to hate on anyone trying to get healthy or anything :))

Thing about me is that I'm fairly immature and I laugh when people say stuff like teabag and unit in public so I'll always think pants shitting is funny.  Even if it is a medical thing...

Did that sound bitchy?

Anywho, regardless of how funny shitting your pants is, the way this reporter on Dateline is all super blasé about the fact that he shat himself and had to go commando for the rest of the night is also notable...that's just downright creepy!

Al Roker -- I Sharted Myself at the White House - Watch More Celebrity Videos or Subscribe

Like laugh already, bitch!  It's a shat story!

Image Via www.breitbart.com

Anderson Cooper's Talk Show is Dunzo

Aw!  Who fires the Silver Fox, man!?!  A goddamn POX on your house whoever axed him!  (See how I classed this shit up with some Shakespeare?  That's for youuuu, Anderson!!!)

BUT > I'll admit, as much as I looove me some Anderson (getting him to marry Andy Cohen is on my bucket list - POWER COUPLE!!!) I never really watched his daytime show too much.

When I did tune in, it was all right I suppose...It's daytime though, you know?  It's Maury Pauvich yelling "You ARE the father!!!" and Rachael Ray making stupid fucking cupcakes - but in my estimation he held his own in the sunnier hours.  Turns out I wasn't the only one not tuning in and apologizing to Real Housewives for no good reason and talking to Mama Boo Boo about her forklift foot didn't bring the newsman high enough ratings to bring his talk show into a 3rd season.

In a statement to Us Weekly he said, "I am very proud of the work that our terrific staff has put into launching and sustaining our show for two seasons.  I am also grateful to Telepictures for giving me the opportunity, and indebted to viewers, who have responded so positively. I look forward to doing more great shows this season, and though I'm sorry we won't be continuing, I have truly enjoyed it."

Guy like NEVER fails so despite what he says it still prob smarts like a bitch.  But hey, the sweet is never as sweet without the sour, right?

See ya back on CNN you beautiful bastard.  (PS - I heard Andy wants to express his condolences over a candlelit dinner so you should definitely call marry him!)

Image Via www.justjared.com

Jimmy Kimmel Spoofs a New Kate Gosselin Dating Show - VIDEO

I don't know about you guys but Kate Gosselin scares the hell outta me!  She's a little less scary without that fucked up chick mullet but still!  This chick will slice and dice you with that bitchy tongue of hers!

Sushi-Style!

Check out this Kimmel spoof about a new money-making show for Kate and her 8 little paychecks >

(The actual faux promo starts a minute in if you're not into Kimmel...)



The sad part is, if this were a show, I'd probably watch it lol!  I'm like, totally sick!

Image Via www.youtube.com

20/20 Interview with RHOC's Newest "Deadbeat" Brooks Ayers VIDEO

ACK!  Slade who?

For some weird ass reason Vicki "I cry all the time because I'm the happiest I've ever been" Gunvalson's man Brooks Ayers was on 20/20 on Friday and shit was not good...

Brooks has only been on the show for a hot minute and has spent most of that time being Vicki's 'Yes Man' and generally just creeping everybody out with greeting cards and shit...the ladies are not a fan.  And evidently, his ex is not a big fan either.

You see, when his ex baby mama - Nicolette Catanzarite - caught wind that homeboy did an interview calling her kid with him his "extra" child, bitch went nuts, called up 20/20 and put his ass on blast in front of a multi-million person audience...

Yikes!  Take that fur coat off, Vick and RUN like the wind!  BACK TO DONN, BACK TO DONN!

Here's the vid >  It's really good - she shows the interviewer some of her own greeting cards from Brooks with the same Southern "sweet talk" and all!



I really do miss Donn man...  :(

Image Via www.youtube.com

Mike Seaver Called Homosexuals Destructive to Civilization on Piers Morgan

Well, DAY-UM bitch!  Tell us how you really feel!

During an interview last night on Piers Morgan, Kirk Cameron, former "Growing Pains" star, made some nasty and hella unnecessary ignorant ass remarks about homosexuals.

When talking about how he doesn't support gay marriage, Kirky boy said, "I think that it's...unnatural.  I think that it's detrimental, and ultimately destructive to so many of the foundations of civilization."

Wowsa!  That's pretty effin' rude...

GLAAD has since stepped in to spank him though and say that they will monitor his events, bookings and acting gigs in order to ensure that "...the news and entertainment industry is aware of his outrageous, anti-gay views."

Go on, GLAAD!  RUIN HIS SMALL MINDED ASS!

Nah, just kidding.  ;)

On a personal level, it DOES upset me that I used to kiss this poopoohead's Teen Beat tear out page every night when I was ten though...bleh!  Should've been kissin' one of the Corey's pics - they were a hot mess but at least they weren't hateful homophobes...

(Editor's Note:  RIP - Boner Stabone  That was a damn shame, man - A damn shame.)

Image Via www.robmba.blogspot.com

Barbara Walter's 10 Most Fascinating People are Not So Fascinating ...

Oh BabaWawa!  You crazy bitch!  Just makin' up lists and tellin' us who to be fascinated by each year!  I love it, girl - Don't ever change!

The list for Miss I am The View's most fascinating people 2011 has leaked out like a bad anal sore and shit is not cute.  Lemme give you a rundown...bitchy drunk blogger style!

Of course, we have the eldest KarTrashians (see what I did there?) because nobody can fucking do anything anymore without mentioning these hobags...Yes, all three of the non-Jenner spermed ones will be in the house...Queen of the fake marriages Kim will be there with her knocked up sister Kourtney and that beast Khloe taking up 3 whole spots on the list!  So far Babs, not so fascinated...

Simon Cowell is on the upcoming special and okay, I can get down with some Simon...He's a feisty bitch, eh?  I like it...I like it a lot.  (I will never forgive you for Susan Boyle though, you cunt.  Know that.)

Katy Perry is the next most non-fascinating fascinating person and I'm just going to say it - BEARD!!!  I'd rather watch her gay husband than her...at least he's funny...but aye, I don't make the lists, I just make fun of them.

Next up we have PIPPA!!!  PIPPA FUCKING MIDDLETON!!!  I am so fascinated by the fact that her ass has it's own twitter...wait, what else did she do?  You guys don't know either?  Whatever!  PIPPA!!!   

Modern Family stars Eric Stonestreet and Jesse Tyler Ferguson will make an appearance but since that show is not on Bravo I don't watch it and I have no idea who those people are...

PIPPA!!!

Donald Trump is on the list this year which is a little sketchfest because he has gone all birther-crazy from drinking the fucking Kool-Aid, but he's a good buddy of Bab's so apparently that gives him license to be both fascinating and an asshole. 

Last but not least we have New York Yankees captain Derek Jeter and his fine ass!  Hell-oooo!  No talking, just take your shirt off thankyouverymuch.  That's all we want.  Show us your tits!

I'm so fascinated right now.

Image Via www.jezebel.com

Patti Stanger is Sorry She's an Asshole ... (Kind Of)

I don't watch this Millionaire Matchmaker garbage anymore...too toxic - and I have a HIGH ass threshold for toxic.

However, Bravo is my crack and Andy is my dealer, so Patti Stanger and her general foulness still smack up against my radar from time to time.  She's like the turd that won't flush.

Well, a while's back she took asshole to a whole new level and made some harsh remarks about jews and gays on Watch What Happens Live with Bravo Kingpin Andy Cohen (who is both jewish and gay).  Her remarks angered both communities to some extent and though she gave a half ass apology to UsWeekly right after she got bad press it happened, Andy couldn't resist bringing it BACK up at the MM reunion.

She started with, "I want the gay community to know that I love them… " and then things went all wonky from there.

"I couldn't sleep knowing that I hurt the gay community...this is my mission in life: To help the gay community."  Yeah right!  This chick is ALL about the Benjamins!  Make no mistake, there's no love at this matchmaking joint!  Just nasty comments and foul treatment.

Stanger claims the backlash from her comments made her afraid to speak her mind (but only for about a week - the chick is UNREAL!) and during that week she did some soul searching and praying.

Apparently, God himself told Stanger it was coo' so she doesn't think twice about the fact that she's a megabitch anymore, she did admit that her delivery needed "to be a little softer."

Non-apology...UNACCEPTED!  Now, go scratch.

Image Via www.ew.com

Maury Povich Invites Justin Bieber to Take Paternity Test on Show

I fucking knew it!!!  Man!  I need to start betting on more shit!  If I had a buck for every time I called a celeb a douchebag and it turned out that they actually were one, I'd be rollin' in it.  And if NWA is to be believed than apparently, 'Life ain't nothin' but bitches and money' and I don't want no bitches so the money would be nice...

But anyways...  

So basically, I've just been sittin' here, waitin' around...wondering when in the god damn hell Maury was going to do his job - NAY his civic duty - and get this kid to take a pat test on his paternity-test-obsessed show.   Well, I can stop wondering now and go back to harassing my cat, The Judge (shout out BooBoo!), because...

Perezitos.com is reporting that the talk show LEGEND has "...reached out to Beibs and invited him to and his accuser, Mariah Yeater, to come on his show...a spokesperson for the show says "We are actively pursuing this story."  A former executive producer for the show says, "Maury is trusted by millions of viewers and if Maury told Justin 'You are not the father,' everyone would believe it."

Well, that and the negative paternity test but whatevs...I trust Maury though...I work from home so I get down with a little trash TV during the day.  He sometimes loses out to Springer but mostly interferes with my reruns of Housewives on Reality Channel so I rarely check him out but when I do, he seems to know what he's doing.

DO IT BIEBER!

Or don't...what the hell do I care? 

Image Via www.twirlit.com

Giuliana Rancic Has Breast Cancer

Aw!

E! correspondent and Ryan Seacrest bestie was on the Today show on Monday and revealed that she has breast cancer.  She has been trying to conceive via IVF for a while with hubby, first Apprentice winner Bill Rancic and the last time she went her doctor insisted on a mammogram.

"He said, 'I will not get you pregnant' " without ruling out her small risk of breast cancer, " 'because if you get pregnant it will accelerate the cancer, all the hormones will accelerate the cancer,' " said Rancic.  "They called me the next day and told me, 'We need to you to come back, we see something.'"

Rancic is going to start radiation.

Hope everything works out okay.

Image Via www.latimes.com

Patti Stanger Was An Asshole on Watch What Happens Live

Now I'm not a Stanger fan.  Let's be real here.  I don't like how she berates people's looks all the time or how she makes up rules like she knows something that we don't know.  She's a jerk and her hateful ass should be cancelled.  Then today - like God coming through my computer and handing me a little piece of vindication for my distaste - I read about the stunt she pulled on the premiere of Watch What Happens Live.

Her most ignorant comments seem to have been that gays can't be monogamous and Jewish men lie...

Oh reeeaaallly?  Apparently the host, Andy Cohen (both gay and a jew), looked unimpressed and quite uncomfortable with the blanket judgement.  Stanger went at the subject again with her wretched harpy tongue when he asked about gays and open relationships.  Patti said, "There's no curbing the gay!  I've tried to curb you people and you just don't [change]. I've decided to throw in the towel and just say, 'Do what you want. But when you find the right person, you will know.'"

When Cohen (pretty much HER BOSS - stupid bitch) countered back that as a gay man he wants a monogamous relationship, Patti laughed in his face and shot back, "When was the last time you had a [serious] boyfriend?"

Ugh!  Foul woman!  And BTW, has anyone seen her Andy since the break-up?  I'm not even so sure that dude is still alive!

Anyways, since the upset Patti has apologized for being an asshole telling US Weekly,  "I am so sorry. I did not mean to offend anyone with my comments last night on Watch What Happens Live."  Puh-lease!  Obvi I'm not above being offensive but you never screw around with certain things...so hush puppy! 

Bravo released the following statement: "Her comments are not representative of the network's beliefs and opinions. We apologize for the offense it caused."

Just fire her already!

Image Via www.tmz.com

Charlie Sheen on Leno - The Bitch is Back!

I'll admit, though I'm a HUGE fan of Charlie Sheen, I was one of the peeps shooting off my yap about how he is sooo fucked and how he'll never be able to come back from the public shit he pooped out earlier this year but I'll be damned if the legendary sex machine didn't turn my opinion around about an hour ago on Leno!  The Sausage King of Chicago is back!  And it looks like he has all his teeth again...so that's also good!

Entering the stage to a half ass standing ovation, Charlie sat down with Leno for his first real interview back since his meltdown and here's what the hooker-lovin' star had to say...(Keep in mind it was hard for me to transcribe the interview because Charlie's been on coke for about 30 years and speaks pretty quickly - I managed to scribble down the "important" shit though.)

His POV about the whole breakdown:
"Wow.  It was like I was on a runaway train I was the reluctant conductor of...I said some things that were a little out there.  These were just metaphors."

On if he was out of control:
"Absolutely."

On when he decided to snap out of his gnarly fuckery:
"When I got fired and I realized I was pretty much LOSING!  I thought I could come back, kind of like you did."  (Hahaha!  That was a good one!  Zing Leno!)

On if he's pissed at CBS and the fact that he got fired:
"I'd have fired my ass too...I own my part in that and I just want to make everything right."

On dating and any possible new goddesses:
"I don't think you could call what I do dating.  I'm single.  I'm in work mode."

On the upcoming, much-anticipated Comedy Central roast:
"My career AND life is very roastable."

On if another epic meltdown could and/or would ever happen again: 
"I'm all out of slogans."  (Word!  That quote is EPIC!)

The interview was really effin' funny and I dare say this bitch is back!  Good for him - if anyone needs me, I'll be watching Ferris Bueller, eating my words...

Image Via www.guardian.co.uk

Christine O'Donnell Throws a Fit and Walks Out on Piers Morgan

But she's still not a witch so...that's good.

Christine O'Donnell was on Piers Morgan about an hour ago and bitch ended up throwing a fit and walking the eff out!  Who does she think she is?  Paris Hilton???

Honey, you are NO Paris!

O'Donnell seemed to be holding her own against the superstar interviewer until he brought up questions about gay marriage - keep in mind, through the whole interview she (not so skillfully) shimmied her way around ANY sort of controversial topics throughout even though the book she was there to promote was apparently chalked full of snazzy anecdotes about her greatest hits.

Basically, O'Donnell was there to talk about the book but did not want to talk about the book - huh?

She did go a bit into the mentality behind her I'm-not-a-witch-gate and the anti-masturbation clips from MTV but then dodged other questions also relative to her book.  O'Donnell even had the gall to ask some crazy batshit question like, shouldn't I be allowed to just talk about what I want to?

Um no!  It's an interview to talk about YOUR book.  YOU said all that shit!  Hell, YOU wrote it down to make money!  

So, yeah - interviewers interviewing you about your book can ask you about what's in it!

Dumbass.

Image Via www.broadcastingcable.com  

The Hills Movie - Say it Ain't Soooo!

I'm a big fan of The Hills - HUGE!  Even after they dicked me over with that BS final episode where Brody was left standing in a studio lot after pretending to say bye to my fave bitch, Kristin Cavallari - yeah, I can deal with that - I knew it was fake...

But to make a 90-minute movie out of reality porn is about as appealing as french kissing Spencer Pratt - and like most, it's not for me.

Audrina was the first one to get this rumorball rolling with some coy, ceiling eye comments to Ryan Seacrest saying, "Maybe we'll all come back together and do a movie, you never know."  This has somehow turned into - "They're definitely doing a movie so let's ask the other cast members what they think," sort of thing so when Whitney Port was questioned by People.com about a flick she just HAD to comment.

Port said, "I think it would be cool.  It would be cool!" so apparently she seems to think it would be cool lol - Lauren would probably rather die than deal with this fuckery again and Speidi is busy being hated and going broke - God knows what Jen Bunney and the others think of it but they were always just B-players anyway.

Keep in mind NOTHING is happening with this - "I don't know that there's anything actually happening," Port also told People - "I didn't know what she was talking about."  Amen sista!  I don't know what any of you are talking about anymore!

Image Via www.confessionsofaglamaholic.com

Nipples, Nipples, Everywhere...Nicki Minaj and Kelly Rowland Slip Up

Oh how I long for the days when I was just a wee one and I didn't have to have famous nipples in my face 24/7 because pop stars were shameless nipple baring whores!  It was a simpler time - but alas I live in a nipplier time now - so I adjust...

For those of you gettin' all sorts of hot and bothered about Nicki Minaj flashing her tittays on GMA or Kelly Rowland giving the good, old double-nipple salute during a concert in Jersey I say to you - we all have nipples!  It's not a big deal!

Sure, maybe your little kid was watching GMA while you were ignorantly and blissfully fixing some Cheerios in the kitchen and maybe now all he/she will talk about is boobies but hey, could be worse...

At least it wasn't a crotch shot.  Personally I find their shitty music a helluva lot more offensive.    

Image 1 Via www.celebpromoter.com 
Image 2 Via www.thehollywoodgossip.com

Kelly Osbourne Calls XTina a Cunt and Puts Kate Middleton on Blast

Sup Kelly Osbourne's newly skinny ass lately???  She's spreading the hate around like a Real Housewife of New York!

First she got on Christina Aguilera on The Fashion Police saying, "Maybe she is just becoming the fat bitch she was born to be. I don't know. She was a cunt to me. And she bought my house!"  (Not her house - her rich daddy's house - the one from the show.)  She went on to say, "She called me fat for so many fucking years...So you know what? Fuck you! You're fat too."  Yikes!  If that ain't the fat kettle calling the fat pot fat!  Sounds like someone has some issues with herself.  The feud was actually started by Kelly (when she was a fat cow mind you) way back in 2003, when Kelly publicly announced that the singer’s Christmas album made her want to stab herself.  I couldn't find any sort of garbage about Xtina calling her fat but who knows - weird thing is Kelly has come out before crying about people making fun of fatties - She told Us Weekly a whiles back that, "I took more hell for being fat than I did for being an absolute raging drug addict. I will never understand that."  I guess now that Obsourne has lost almost 50 pounds she's starting to understand.  Moving on...  

On Leno Miss Osbourne showed up looking like a jacked up Marilyn Monroe wannabe and took some shots at the lovely Kate Middleton too (for those who don't know Kate she's Pippa Middleton's sister - and it's ALL about Pippa.)  She said, "If had had that job I would only wear it once. If I am going to be the future bloody Queen of England I'm going to wear that dress once because I'm giving up the rest of my life, all of my privacy. At least I can get a new dress every day!"  Um yeah, sooo...that's stupid!  You know, for those of us who didn't grow up in a haunted mansion with Ozzy fucking Osbourne footing the bill, we don't really see the point in spoiled celebrities and pretentious royals thinking that the most important thing in the world is a new dress.  Kelly also said that she'd also get new gitches everyday if she were Duchess. "Well, if I could, I would.  That's a really good idea, actually."  Though I'm tempted I'm not going to make any smelly vadge jokes here but I could - know that.

So anyways, the whole thing is lame and Kelly sucks balls etc. etc. etc.

Hear that Kelly?  LAME!  Madonna should fire your ass for being so lame and buggering up her Material Girl line with your lameness!  

And before you mofos start writing me comments and emails about being anti-fat, it's just shits and gigs people - I don't really think either one is fat - however I do really think that chicks are unapologetic BITCHES to each other.

Image Via www.four.co.nz

Harrison Ford Versus ... Chewbacca! VIDEO

When I was a kid watching Star Wars I remember thinking that Chewbacca bitch was no good!!!

Check this out:



Image Via www.flickr.com

Kat Von D Ditches Interview on GDLA

Girlfriend is PISSED!

Kat Von D walked out moments before an interview on GDLA supposedly because they mentioned the J word - Jackass.  No just kidding, JESSE!

Quickly becoming the go-to guy for repping shady jerkoffs, the name Jesse put the fear of God into the dumbass because she got the fuck outta dodge and took to twitter to bash the show:

"Dear GoodDayLA [sic], thanks for the waste of a perfectly good morning. Lack of compassion n [sic] respect for eachother [sic] never fails to dissappoint [sic] me."

I get it...I wouldn't want to talk about the scumbag either.  But aye, here's the rub...

HER people sent a clip of her stupid show with Jesse in it (of her getting that god awful tat of the mofo's face no less - lol) and HER people told GDLA nothing was off limits (including that skank Jesse) besides any mention of Sandra Bullock. 

So go fucking kvetch at them, you jerk!  Seems to me that the only one hurt in this walk off is Von D herself.  Afterwards, Jillian Barbarie Reynolds stood up for GDLA in a segment and lashed out at Kat for being unprofessional.

Doesn't feel to good, does it Kat?  Maybe you get a small idea about how Miss Bullock felt when Jesse used his married peen to eff anything that moved while they were adopting a new baby.  Lay down with a dirty dog - wake up with fleas.

Image Via www.247newsline.com

Bethenny Frankel Is Over Reality TV

She wants to move on, yo!  To the illustrious world of...

Talk shows!  Jazz hands!

The reality star and booze whore said, "I'm getting tired of reality TV, of every moment being documented. But a talk show, where I could have longer conversations than on Facebook or Twitter - would be great. There are many things I want to talk to women about. While the other housewives were off getting drunk, I was doing business."  Go Ricki, Go Ricki...

Ugh - let's not make another Oprah people!  I can't deal with another woman who thinks she knows everything and whose swooning clones follow her every move.  NO MORE OPRAHS!  And what's with the shady bitch making a gnarly Housewives slam???  Low blow!  Sure, they like to get their booze on, but there's no need to bring it up outta nowhere - they all have kids, man!    

Bethenny is admittedly not my favorite person.  I find her condescending, mean-spirited and uber self-involved.  I mean, who the fuck goes on and on about how crazy they are all the time and how much it sucked to be raised by a mother who was a surly drunk?  YOU'RE 40!  If you must talk about your mommy issues 24-7 get your shrink's fucking phone no. and call his ass up to talk...I'm all stocked up on crazy here.

Anyways, she has co-hosted The View a few times but was steamrolled by bigger and better stars Whoopi and Joy and has done an impressive job of turning reality bullshit into Skinnygirl gold (any other Housewives ever going to be on the cover of Forbes???  Don't think so.)  But this is show business not the liquor business, and it's not about how much monopoly money you have, it's about people...something she's a little less successful with.

Image Via www.accesshollywood.com