Samantha Ronson - BUSTED!

Just when we all thought Lindsay was the troublemaker!

Sam Ronson was cruisin' back to LA from Vegas in her black porsche yesterday when she got pulled over for speeding...AT 10:30 AM!!!!

The fuck is drunk at 10:30 am???

Anyways, they tried to get Lindsay's favorite vagina to hop around on one foot or whatever the hell they do to drunks to test them for their drunkenness and Sam failed...she then refused to do a breathalyzer or "roadside blow" (lol) as they sometimes call it and was taken in.

TMZ is reporting that her buddies are not surprised and that they think Sam's hittin' the bottle like she's the newest cast member of Jersey Shore - even Lohan apparently thinks she's partying too hard!  What what? 

The mug shot above was just released and girl is lookin' all sorts of Smirky McSmirkerson in it!  Not cool, dude!  NO DRINKING AND DRIVING, IDIOTS!  Stop it!

Image Via www.usmagazine.com

Lindsay Lohan Stages Photos to Make Sam's New Woman Jealous

This is a little crazy...

If you saw the pics of Lindsay leaving Sam's house with a teddy bear that said "I Love You" you would be thinking, "Oh, look - Sam still loves Lindsay!  She got her a crappy little teddy bear that says I Love You on it...Linds must be telling the truth about Sam's new gal just being a mutual friend!"

But you would be WRONG!

Turns out our first lady of photo ops was doing just that...creating a photo op!

A couple of the photographers have come forward saying that though they caught pics of the wacktress holding Sam's doorknob (no pun intended) and walking back over to her own neighboring home she was never in the house!  She just walked up with the bear already, posed as if she was leaving Sam's lesbian pleasure palace and then walked back over to her stage-five clinger beach house.

WTF is that?

A source says, "Lindsay always sets up photos to get out the message she wants. And it worked because she got Samantha's attention. Sam even tweeted about the photos. Ever since Lindsay saw the picture of Sam kissing that girl, she's been trying to make Sam jealous."

When her crazy ex-vagina's antics got back to Sam, she tweeted "i love when the internet makes me a super hero- i was home at the same time i was at dinner. pix of me leaving dinner last night win. PROOF"

She didn't provide the proof but she seems to imply that there are pics online of her at dinner at the same time she was supposedly making up with Lindsay and giving her cheap teddy bears.  I looked for some of the pics (mind you not very hard) but no dice.

So, the moral of the story is Lindsay is psycho, Sam is dating someone else, paps will both sell pics of you and also sell you out and exes probably shouldn't live next door to each other.

Image Via www.allieiswired.com

Who is Samantha Ronson's New Girl???

Tiffany Russo is her name and flipping to lesbianism is her game!

Turns out Sam's new make out partner is a divorced yoga instructor who was married for 7 plus years to some dude who is now questioning his manhood.

Oooooh - yoga!  Flexible!

Lindsay's new public enemy number one and Sam have been spotted around town stretching and kissing and generally just pissing off Lindsay.  Don't fall off the wagon, Boo!

Sam and Lindsay are neighbors so I smell a white trash confrontation coming up soon...Cops-style!

Image Via www.radaronline.com

Lindsay Lohan - Court Battles, Lesbians and Name Changes

Whew, I can't even keep up with Lindsay news this week!  She should change her last name to Kardashian and go get herself a reality show cuz this bitch is everywhere!

First off, Lindsay didn't take the plea deal.  Saw that one coming...she maintains her innocence and says she doesn't steal or lie.  It wouldn't be so bad for her if the DA wasn't planning on using her history as a lying thief as one of her main points in the upcoming trial.  Psst, Linds...when there is evidence that you have stolen and lied in the past best not to make these statements.  Just a tip.  And looks like there are even more legal troubles for Lindsay coming because the popo are planning on re-opening that case where she beat down a Betty Ford staffer...Lindsay is getting to be so gangsta!  Her street cred must be through the roof!

Secondly, TMZ is reporting that LiLo is pissed off as Hell about some pics that surfaced yesterday where Samantha is macking some other chick.  Let it go, man!  She ain't yo' girl!  They say she is pissed because before her favorite vagina got busy tongue wrestling some chicky in LA she was apparently dropping the l-word and cooing in Lindsay's thug-ass ear that she loved her.  Stay tuned on this one because sources told TMZ that she plans on confronting her ex the minute she get's off the plane in NYC and Lindsay isn't exactly a demure, young lady...I fully expect drinks being thrown (non-alcoholic of course) and extensions being pulled.  Should be pretty funny.

Lastly, and only God knows if this shit is true - DListed.com is reporting that Dina Lohan is talking some shit about LiLo dropping the Lohan from her name and just going by Lindsay calling her a one-name wonder.  Puh-lease!  She is no Cher, Madonna or even a Sisqo!  Dina is also saying that she and the less-talented sister Aliana are changing their last names back to Sullivan, Dina's maiden name.  But we can just file that one away in the who gives a shit? folder. 

So, another banner week for Lindsay comes to an end.  What a girl!

Image Via www.thesunblog.com

Lindsay Moves Next Door to Sam!

Ladies and gentlemen - we officially have a stage-five clinger...

Damn girl!  Stalk much?!?

So, Lindsay got out of rehab at the beginning of the month and what's a young, crazy, adderall-popping starlet to do?  Why, move in next to the lesbian love of your life of course!!!

The two are now neighbours on Venice Beach (to Sam's dismay) and our Loco Lohan has apparently been telling friends that she had "no idea" that's where her favorite vagina lived.  Yeah, why would she know where Samantha lives, yo?!?  Give me a break!

I mean, what are the odds of that?  Reminds me of the chick in Wedding Crashers...I can already hear Lindsay's raw, smoker's voice cooing from her balcony to Sam's, "I found you..."

The wacktress has also apparently said that she wants to build a fence so Sam can't spy on her...WTF dude?  Don't you hate it when you move next door to the chick you're stalking and she wants to spy on you?  I mean, come on Sam, don't be weird, man!

Image Via www.holyl.blogspot.com