The 2012 Met Gala Barfed Up a Bunch of Fashion Last Night

Image Via www.thatgrapejuice.net

Last night the Metropolitan Museum of Art was awash with the beautiful people in all their finest gear.  All the pomp and circumstance aside, the Met Gala is about fashion...fashion and Justin Timberlake's ass...

That sweet, sweet ass...

Let's take a looky-loo and see who shut that shit down and who was just...shut down.

The most beautiful woman in the world wore the ugliest lace dress known to man.

Cameron Diaz covered up her man arms and channeled Helen Mirren for the night.

Chloe Sevigny went for her standard I Color Outside the Box look.

Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy looking all sorts of right!

Christina Ricci had a little mishap here when one dress tried eating another one...

Emma Stone does no wrong, yo!  She's the new Natalie Portman - time's gonna tell on that shit. ;)

Here's a picture of Gwyneth Paltrow pretending she's not older than everyone else.

HATE Jessica Alba...LOVE this dress.  Stupid Jessica Alba!

Jessica Biel wore her curtains and LOOK!!!  There's Justin Timberlake's fine ass!!!  Gratuitous Justin Timberlake picture topless in black and white coming up >

Image Via www.zimbio.com

Oh yeah!  That's the stuff!

Back to the Met though...Kristen Stewart wore this ridiculous shit and forwarded that memo right over to...

...Mary-Kate Olsen who threw on some mad black satin - lol WTF is this?

I'm guessing that Sarah Jessica Parker sent the aforementioned Wear Ridiculous Shit memo.  Yikes!

Rihanna can't really look bad, but I've seen her look hella better.

This is Rachel Zoe's skeleton covered up in loose white bandages.  Someone should prob call 911 ASAP...

Giselle Bundchen Brady looks fine as hell but I can't even look at Tom Brady any more.  #AntiFauxhawk

And the WTF award goes to granny panties herself, Elizabeth Banks!  That is not a good look, dude!  Thatisall.


Post Images Via www.toofab.com

Angelina's Right Leg, J. Lo's Nipple and a Wrestler Playing Dress Up - It's The Oscars, Bitches!!!

Okay, so this is a few days late, but if y'all follow me on twitter (as you should) you would know that I got two new Sims games that have taken over my life...seriously, haven't slept in days...

So tired...

Anywho, I was in and out of consciousness watching Billy Crystal host the shit outta the Oscars like it was 1999, hoping to hell that gorgeous George's pants would "malfunction" (you guys notice it's only chicks who get these wardrobe malfunctions?  BS!  I want to see Clooney PEEEENNNN!!!!) but all I got was a whole lotta boring!

In my estimation the most laughable and memorable moments were given generously by presenters and guests.  Ryan Seacrest started his night on the red carpet by getting the faux Bisquit "ashes" of Kim Jong-Il poured onto his feminine behind by Borat in a promotional stunt for his new flick The Dictator.  They'll be talking about it for years which is like Seacrest crack!  He loves the spotlight and now he's a part of Oscar history!  He held it together basically just having a professional boner in front of everyone and changing his Burberry jacket.  Borat was escorted out.

Everyone was losing their shit over Stacy Kiebler on the carpet...I kept yelling at my TV that "There's a wrestler trying to sneak into the Oscars!" but no one would heed my warnings!  They kept pretending it was okay that a wrestler was at the Oscars!  It was awkward - like when I accidentally touched my cat's butt and wouldn't make eye contact for days...well, not really like that, but my life is very different from that of a Clooney ho - so I make adjustments to my metaphors...Sick Marchesa dress though - SICK!    

Image Via www.instyle.com

J. Lo and Cameron Diaz took the stage and showed their million dollar asses off before turning about face and giving me an eyeful of Lopez nipple...yawn!  The boob's been done, J. Lo!  So played out!!!  Her PR team is lying and saying that it's a shadow, but I know me a nipple when I see me a nipple and that shit was a nipple!!!  Or a nipple shaped shadow ;).  And not to be a major bitch here - but did Gigli win an Oscar for shittiest movie and I missed it???  Why is there a singer there???  Just sing Jenny From the Block to all of us already and go on about your bizness, woman!  NEXT!

Image Via www.onyxbook.com

Saint Angelina Jolie of Pittopia pulled some weird stunt queen shit on stage (and all the way down the red carpet) when she went to present posing like she was goddamn Christy Turlington or something!  It was a total Snooki/CourtneyStodden thing to do and Ang is NO Snooki/CourtneyStodden so when she did it, it just seemed really, really stupid.  (She even re-adjusted her stunt queen pose when her leg wasn't sexy enough for her liking!)  Twitter blew up, everyone made fun of her and it now seems jamming your leg out awkwardly has become something of the new Tebowing or Planking - Also, her skinny, pale gam now has a twitter page called Angelina's Right Leg if you're one of those jerks on twitter who follows trend accounts in lieu of funny, blogger's accounts that are AWESOME!  (Editor's Note:  Follow me on Twitter at @BungledBotched!)

Oh and for those of you interested in the actual awards, Meryl Streep took - nay STOLE - top actress from Jen Lindley of Dawson's Creek (on Cosmo channel everyday still at four BTW.)  The french dude who said two words in The Artist won best actor and his movie took top spot as best movie.

Then I fell back asleep...

...Nipple shadow - pfft!  Gimme a break!

Image Via www.gossipwhyfame.com

P. Diddy Might Be Hitting This...

Boom!

This one's a little weird but I'll roll with it...

So, apparently it is ON for Cameron Diaz and her fave booty call Puff Daddy aka P. Diddy aka Diddy aka Puffy aka...oh whatever...

News sources have reported in the past that these two have hooked up and generally have a friends with benefits thing goin' on whenever they're both single at the same time but now it looks like they may make a go of an actual relationship.

PerezHilton reports, "The two were seen at Catch in NYC on October 24 being "inseparable." Onlookers commented on their inability to keep their hands off each other.  Then on November 11, they were both seen making out at Scarpetta in Beverly Hills!!!  Of course, both stars' reps say they're just friends."

Thing is, Diddy has a woman right now.  Some chick named Cassie who is the face of his clothing line and a singer who used to bang 50 Cent.  They work together so if he is cheating, he's in for some shitty days at the office.

Good luck with the love triangle though!  Huge fan of both of y'all!  Holla. 

Image Via www.scarlettjohansson2011.blogspot.com

The Week in Break Ups

There are a few stars crying into their couture this week as a couple of high profile relationships have come to a untimely timely end...

Scarlett Johansson and Sean Penn are no more.  ScarHo 26, and Penn 50, were together for five months and made headlines when she gave him a crotch rub with her foot in public and also when they attended Reese Witherspoon's wedding together.  Saw this one coming a mile away...there's only so many times she could listen to him wax political and he prob got sick of her yelling Ryan's name out in bed.   

Amy Winehouse and rehab have parted ways once again.  After only a week, wino Winehouse has peaced out of the Priory Clinic in London.  No word on if she's all better but I highly doubt it...she stopped for a bottle of vodka on the damn way in!

CamRod is o-v-e-r!  No more Yankee love for Cameron Diaz as her and Alex Rodriguez are dunzo.  It seems like just yesterday she was feeding him popcorn like she was his bitch.  "They've broken up," an insider told FitPerez. "[Cameron is] hurt and betrayed, because she tried so hard to please him ... She went overboard."  Desperate Debbie is not a good look for anyone, Cam but don't worry - you can do better anyway. 

Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston may not be friends anymore!  If this were the 90s I would totally give a shit but since JenAn's movies suck balls now and Courtney has all but faded away on some Cougar show...meh.

Aniston and Cox have not been photographed together in nearly a year and a source (which means nothing these days) has confirmed that there is "tension" between Aniston and Cox.  Apparently, Aniston has a big stick up her ass about Cox's behavior while she is separated from her husband of 11 years David Arquette.  Allegedly her behavior reminds Aniston of her own heartache with her ex husband Brad Pitt.  Aniston's rep says, "It's a complete fabrication. There was no fall[ing] out and Jennifer considers Courteney to be a dear and close friend."

Image Via www.chillopedia.com

The Hottest Chicks This Year - According to Maxim's Hot 100

A Bungled and the Botched break down. 

Let's see...we have Winnie Cooper riding high sans Wonder Years at #80 but damn, looks like she was just inched out by JWoww's breasts at #78.

Miley Bird comes in at #64 but was sadly beaten by Vagina Vanessa Hudgens (whose vagina is all over the internet) at #54 (vagina!).  Our favorite jailbird Lindsay landed in her orange jumpsuit at #38 which was just bested by Canadian cutie Avril Lavigne (who better get the hell away from my Brody or I'll cut her!) who came in at #34.

Britney (probably because she's not bald anymore) is at the cusp of the top quarter at #25 followed by Mega Fox, who is down to #17 from #5!  Shouldn't have messed with Michael Bay, man!  NO ONE messes with Michael Bay.

The Black Swans, Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis, came in at #8 and #5 respectively.  Which brings us to the top spots - exciting stuff!  Pfft.

#4 goes to my lesbian crush Cameron Diaz
#3 is last year's #1 Katy Perry (gross - but I'm not a dude, so whatevs)
#2 was nabbed by Olivia Munn - shout out to the half Asians!  Whoot!
And #1 is the new Megan Fox (2.0 shit!) Rosie Huntington Whiteley who famously took over for the vapid brunette after she "left" the latest Transformers Movie

There you go horny dudes - the link is here for pics (y'know *whispers* for spank bank purposes.)  

Image Via www.deccanchronicle.com