Kanye West Smacked Another Photographer Around

Oh Kanye!  You are such a dickhead!

Kim's babydaddy (which is what I am calling this asshole from now on - cuz I like to poke the bear, yo) had yet ANOTHER violent altercation with a pap.

This time (it happened Friday at LAX)  instead of it being kind of funny - see stupidly hilarious video below - he was more aggressive Chris Brown than crazy Amanda Bynes and got all violent as shit on the pap.

Kanye West -- Don't Burst My Privacy Bubble ... Or I'll F*** You Up!!! - Watch More Celebrity Videos or Subscribe

Not cool!

Supposedly felony charges may be looming and I, for one, say lock this bitch up!  I'm sure the paps are annoying as fuck but you CAN'T touch someone!  You just can't!  This isn't Thunderdome!

And who the hell knocks up that skanky famewhore Kimmie Cakes if he wants to be left alone anyways???  Like get a clue, douche.  Perhaps the most wrongly photographed porn star on the planet isn't someone you should knock up if you're concerned about privacy...I mean, I'm no genius but I went to college and shit...I have common goddamn sense!

Here's the VIDEO.

Kris Jenner says he was having a "bad day" so god help that baby or Kim's stupid ass if he has a bad day at home.  I know the first thing I look for in a babydaddy is a violent, uncontrollable temper!

Good luck to Kim and her direction named baby...and SHAME on him for making me feel sorry for Kim who stands for pretty much everything I am against.

EXTRA TIDBIT OF GOSSIP >>>

Fun fact:  This is the same pap who got Brit Brit so pissed off she dropped her Cheetos and attacked his car with her umbrella lol.  That's his car in the pic below...

It really is a small world.

Images Via www.dailymail.co.uk

Whatever Happened to Britney Spears First Husband Jason Alexander?

Hahaha!  I had damn near forgotten about this guy!

For all you who don't remember 2004 - right before Brit Brit went all whackadoo and shaved her head she married some hometown hayseed she had grown up with for a whopping 55 hours in Vegas.  His name was Jason Alexander.

Well, unlike that fat, Cheeto eating motherfucker Kevin Federline - Jason has chosen a different path in life.

Bitch is training to be an MMA fighter!

BAM!  LOOK AT HIM!!!  LOOOK AT HIM!!!

Best of luck, guy!  Methinks you'll never escape the Britney effect and be your own dude but go nuts!

Anything is worth a try, right?

Image Via www.kiss925.com

K-Fed Was All Jacked Up Again...

Hot damn!  I'm no doctor, but this guy may need some serious nutritional counseling, man!  Dude's 33 and he's got all sorts of health problems!  Shit is cray!  CRAY!!!

For the second time in less than 10 weeks, professional weight loss topic K-Fed, has had health probs on the set of Australia's rip off of Celebrity Fit Club, Excess Baggage.  He collapsed in ep one from heat exhaustion (which BTW I totally get, it's like 100 fucking degrees down under!  That's some hot ass shit!)  This time his heart was going apeshit so as a precautionary measure he was taken to the hospital.  Aside from the rapid heart beat he was complaining about chest pains...

Maybe his heart is broken from BRITNEY!!!  AW!!!

A heart attack was ruled out but guy should still probably lay off the Cheetos.  He's got five damn kids!

Won't somebody think of the kids!!!???!!!

Seriously, dude.  No more Cheetos.

Image Via www.dlisted.com

TMZ Reports Britney Spears is Getting Engaged Tonight!

Third time's a charm, girlfriend!  At least this dude has a damn job... 

TMZ is reporting that our beloved first Lady of Cheetos is getting hitched...again!

Jason Trawick, her man of 5 years (yes, she's been with him longer than both her marriages combined), is supposedly going to pop the question tonight...

...IN VEGAS!!!  That's sooo old-school Brit!  Classic!

TMZ says, "[TMZ is] told Britney knows they're getting engaged, so it's not going to be a big surprise."

Haha!  Well, that's good!  Fucking spoiler alert lol!

TMZ goes on to say, "Sources say Britney's conservators have given their stamp of approval.  The matter will go before the judge in the conservatorship case but it's virtually certain Brit will get the judge's sign off."

Well, congrats you little head-shaving pop star!  To both of you!   

Chicken wings and Pepsi for everyone! 

Image Via www.inrumor.com

Britney Spears Brings Little Sean Preston on Stage - VIDEO

I knew Brit could make a comeback!  I remember thinking, 'Girlfriend!' (that's what I call her in my mind because that is where we are friends) anyways, I would think 'Girlfriend!  You got this!  You just need to get back up - get a new weave, hike up those bitch boots, throw on those titty tassles and rock this mutha!'  And bitch is rockin' it!

So now she's got a kickass album, a badass tour, Pauly D as a opening act, no damn pink wig or K-Fed (WTF was that hot mess about?) and two healthy and happy little boys.  Little Sean Preston Federline is the eldest of the two and the superstar mommy decided to take him out on stage two nights ago to bask in the love of her fans, atta girl!

Editors Note:  This is totally random footage I jacked at PerezHilton so I don't know how many Sambucas this fool had before filming but it's pretty damn shaky lol - Yeesh!  Anyways, here ya go. 



Image Via www.thehollywoodgossip.com

Britney Spears Uses Drugs??? Picks Nose???

Or perhaps does both at the same time!!!  Ay Carumba!

Court papers have leaked stemming from the sexual harassment suit against Brit by her former bodyguard, Fernando Flores.  The papers include some gnarly-ass new dirt on the pop princess including all sorts of intriguing stories of alleged nose-picking and an apparent aversion to deodorant. 

Stinky bitch... 

Now keep in mind, this suit was filed by the dude who says Brit Brit got all buck nekkid and "paraded" around in front of him and that she used to beg him for sex so...grain of salt.  

Generally the papers seem to highlight two mayjah topics - Britney's "drug use" and her personal hygiene (or lack thereof).  Let's start with the claims that she is a disgusting dirtpig who picks her nose, shall we? 

The papers say, "She broke wind or picked her nose unselfconsciously and unapologetically before Plaintiff [Flores] and others and she was constantly and gratuitously loud and profane in her speech...She did not bathe for days on end, did not use deodorant, did not brush her teeth, did not fix her hair, did not wear shoes or socks...Her lackluster grooming is paramount in the suit because Flores insists that is why "the sexual advances of Spears were unwanted..."

Bitch, please!  She's country, y'all!  FUCK!  And eff him if ho farted like a gassy old man and picked her nose "unapologetically."  Why would she apologize to him?  HE works for her!   

According to Flores, he suffered psychological damage, anxiety attacks, depression and insomnia as a result of Britney's alleged harassment.  Pfft!  Harassment?  Just because she's a filthy pig who grew up in a swamp with her grit-eating pa and she disgusts you with her stank doesn't mean you can sue the bitch for $10 mill! 

The drug use allegations state that Britney used various drugs including methamphetamines and a drug used to treat heroin or morphine overdoses.  "Based on his former experience as a police officer, Plaintiff [Flores] is informed and believes and alleged thereon that Defendant Spears was often under the influence of illegal prescription and non-prescription drugs, such as Ritalin, Narcon (Naloxone) and methamphetamines...Defendant Spears was mentally unstable, and personally obnoxious and demanding, requiring her staff on various occasions and for no rationally discernable reasons to address her as "Jennifer" or "Queen Bee," on other occasions, Defendant Spears would cut her hair in an erratic fashion, leaving uneven and bald spots on her head."

Oh snap!  Okay, that's a little more sketchy...chicks don't generally go messin' with their weaves on their own but the whole 'she's a drug addict' deal is like, totally based on nothing!

And who the fuck is Jennifer?

Image Via www.societysex.blogspot.com

Britney Spears' and K-Fed's Stupid, Useless Crap is For Sale

If you ever thought to yourself, I really need to buy some Britney Spears memorabilia from that shady ass time she was with Kevin Federline, then it's your lucky day, fool!

eBay has a whack of their crap for sale by Kevin's grandpappy, Earl Story.  Some of the more notable items include, their shotgun wedding invite, a baby shower invite, a hat K-Fed once wore to an awards show (signed by Brit and K-Fed for added panache) and 14 wedding pics, some of which are unpublished.

Oh BFD!  What the hell are you gonna do with a couple of invites?  Frame 'em and hang them in your damn living room so everyone who comes over can see just how effin' cray cray you are?  And a stinky hat he wore once?  Grandpappy, please!

Apparently, K-Fed's (equally fame-seeking) aunt told TMZ she is helping grandpappy put the items up for sale because K-Fed's grandmammy recently bit the dust and the family prodded him to sell some shit and use the money to vacay it up and help take his mind off things.  Ack!  That seems wrong, no?  Just get the old fart some Netflix and a 6-pack and he'll be ai'ight.

K-Fed has given his blessing and has zero probs with his entire family profiting off his short-lived marriage to the supastar.  And, why would he care anyway?  Dignity?  Integrity?  Nah, that shit went out the door with his rap album.

Image Via www.gossipthroughgossip.wordpress.com

Britney Spears New Video - She's Been Avril Lavigne-ified!

Britney Spears has released her new video and she looks...like Avril Lavigne.  Um, okay?  A little random.

Interesting, but I'm all for doing shit that will entice Brody Jenner I guess - so, go on, girl!

Check out the new video for I Wanna Go:

Leave Britney Alooone! Fool is Making Porn Now

That seems about right...

Remember that tool who screamed and cried about Britney getting slack in the media for being a fucking loon who shaved her head randomly?  Well, he moved on to do semi-great things, they just never fully panned out.  Chris Crocker had a brief reality show that I don't even think made it to air, he sang a tune or two a la William Hung and he started himself a Tumblr account.

The Tumblr account is where he showcases his wares in many states of undress between giving nuggets of Crocker wisdom.  Since the pics have gone up a porn director, named ChiChi LaRue no less, said that she would help him "exhibit what [he] was meant to exhibit." 

Since then, he's said via his Tumblr that he's "doing a full-length porno this summer," and that the "deal's in place."

Whatever...

Image Via www.scrapetv.com

The Hottest Chicks This Year - According to Maxim's Hot 100

A Bungled and the Botched break down. 

Let's see...we have Winnie Cooper riding high sans Wonder Years at #80 but damn, looks like she was just inched out by JWoww's breasts at #78.

Miley Bird comes in at #64 but was sadly beaten by Vagina Vanessa Hudgens (whose vagina is all over the internet) at #54 (vagina!).  Our favorite jailbird Lindsay landed in her orange jumpsuit at #38 which was just bested by Canadian cutie Avril Lavigne (who better get the hell away from my Brody or I'll cut her!) who came in at #34.

Britney (probably because she's not bald anymore) is at the cusp of the top quarter at #25 followed by Mega Fox, who is down to #17 from #5!  Shouldn't have messed with Michael Bay, man!  NO ONE messes with Michael Bay.

The Black Swans, Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis, came in at #8 and #5 respectively.  Which brings us to the top spots - exciting stuff!  Pfft.

#4 goes to my lesbian crush Cameron Diaz
#3 is last year's #1 Katy Perry (gross - but I'm not a dude, so whatevs)
#2 was nabbed by Olivia Munn - shout out to the half Asians!  Whoot!
And #1 is the new Megan Fox (2.0 shit!) Rosie Huntington Whiteley who famously took over for the vapid brunette after she "left" the latest Transformers Movie

There you go horny dudes - the link is here for pics (y'know *whispers* for spank bank purposes.)  

Image Via www.deccanchronicle.com

Britney Talks About New Album and Tour - Video

 Ah, the important issues!

Why'd Brit name the album Femme Fatale?  What are her fave tracks on the record?  What does she think of Will.i.am?

Interested?  Check out the newest interview:



She says Outrageous a few more times than anyone who isn't 12 but she looks sober as hell so go on, girl!  It's Britney Bitch!

Britney Spears: No Hot Dogs and No Alcohol

Ever since Brit Brit broke down like a busted up crackhead she has been living under a Helluva lot of rules - no shock there - you gots to protect the pot o gold, but the weird thing is that the people on her tour are bound by the same rules.

The crew and dancers are banned from pretty much everything she is and that's quite a bit.

The Sun is reporting that on the tour, "The singer has given caterers strict instructions not to make any junk food because she’s not allowed it.  Hot dogs, pizza and cookie dough ice cream have all been blacklisted.  Staff can’t even look forward to having the odd beer to unwind after shows either as Brit has banned alcohol too.  If that’s not gutting enough, they are going to have to listen to MICHAEL JACKSON songs constantly. Britney has requested that Jacko’s albums be played on repeat in her dressing rooms. She has stockpiled his tour DVDs and enlisted the help of his dance team to recreate his routines."

Shit, screw the cookie dough ice cream and hot dogs - those I can live without - but constant Michael Jackson music!?!  I heard somewhere that they used to play constant MJ to criminals at Gitmo back in the day to break them!  Actually, I'm just making that up - but whatevs it prob would've worked!  Torture.  Sheer torture.

Enjoy the tour suckas!  I'm going to go eat a bunch of hotdogs and get drunk now with my idiot friend and bad mouth Michael Jackson - just because I can.

Image Via www.snakesayan.blogspot.com

Britney Signs Nicki Minaj to Tour

Enrique who?

Ever since Iglesias cancelled out on the pop icon, the rumors had been going around about who the replacement might be.  Well, TMZ has confirmed that it is Nicki Minaj who will be taking the stage on the concert tour.

Boon for Brit, boon for Nicki - Enrique, no one seems to care...

The poll on TMZ is showing that 75% are feeling Miss Minaj where only 25% had their little hearts set on Enrique.  Duh!  Sorry Enrique but that was a dumb move!  See you on the next Jersey Shore soundtrack...

Image Via www.sizlr.com 

Britney's 'Till The World Ends - Video

Muy Caliente!

Check out Brit Brit's newest video.



Yeah, she's been a little comatose in her live performances lately but give her a break!  I'm pretty sure she's all medded up!

Image Via www.idolator.com

Femme Fatale Is #1 in Four Countries

Man, ain't no one can stage a comeback like Britney Spears!  First, the Circus tour and album took the world by storm and now Femme Fatale has hit number one in Australia, Brazil, Mexico and Canada.

No word yet on U.S. numbers but with her tidal wave of PR promoting the album, the record has a good chance of hitting #1 there as well.  

Go on, girl!  Someone should give Lindsay Lohan her digits...

Or better yet, just Tweet Lindsay, Britney!  She needs help - her mother is an asshole, her father's a joke and her career is in the shitter!  Rich, white biatches need to stick together!

Image Via www.pollpub.com 

Britney Spears is a Puppet!

Everybody knows that Britney is pimpin' her new record all over the place like a good little dancing bear should but news seems to keep coming out that the pop star is a sad little puppet stifled under Team Britney that they cart out every now and then to perform.

Jimmy Kimmel was the first to speak out about it and now Carson Daly has his panties in a knot about the sitch.  Not to mention the fact that they ensured that her much-hyped GMA performance was pre-taped and not live as usual.

Let's start with Mr. Kimmel...Brit took the stage on his show last night and did her three singles, Hold it Against Me, 'Till the World Ends and Big Fat Bass.  Thing is Big Fat Bass never made it to his website for those who missed the show and he blames her management.  I guess Jimmy was getting some mad Twitter hate so he fought back saying "To all experiencing fits of intense hissy because the @britneyspears bonus song was short, not our decision if it airs online - artist mgmt."

Who knows why they jacked the song from the web but don't blame Jimmy!

In the case of Mr. Daly, she was to be on his radio show to do an interview but he said no effin' way to her management's demands and Tweeted “I was jst TOLD my @britneyspears interview tomm on @ampradio MUST b pre-recorded & submitted 4 approval by HER mgmt b4 it can air! F THAT!  never that restricted. Even when I interviewed Michael Jackson it wasn’t anything like this…it’s really insane."

After receiving backlash about his Tweet including someone calling him an a-hole for kvetching he responded to those, "I’M UNPROFESSIONAL? FAKING AN ENTIRE INTERVIEW? jst shocked her mgmt won’t let her do a normal interview. She probly doesn’t even know. I’ve known and supported her since she was 15. This has nothing to do w her. Just her ppl. ...pre-recording it was NO prob- her mgmnt taking and editing the tapes overnight was the issue. Be well:)"

He's right on!  They've got to loosen those strings, man!  And quit doping her up on meds - though I think she's still got it - she's lost her fire, and that's tragic.

Damn the Man!  Free Britney!  Where's that Youtube asshole at who went viral a ways back screaming and carrying on like a damn fool, "Leeeaaaavvvveeee  Britney Aloooone!"  People seemed to respond to that guy...

Image Via www.lasvegassun.com

K-Fed Knocks up 3rd Baby Mama

Goddamn!  It's a new baby for the most famous ex-popstar hubby on the planet - Kevin Federline.  Two with Shar Jackson, two with Britney Spears and now a new mouth to feed is on the way with Victoria Prince. 

Who is this guy - Jon Gosselin?  Oooh - maybe he's trying to get a reality show on TLC or something... I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a job.  Unless you consider mooching off Brit's child support or getting fat work...and I sure don't.

Congrats, I guess? But warning to Victoria - this guy is nothing but trouble!  Knockin' up chicks...marrying pop stars...releasing shitty rap tracks...DRAMA! 

Best of luck, girlfriend!

Image Via www.igossip.com

It's Britney Bitch! GMA Performance and Announcement

 Lady who?

Britney just hit the stage at GMA in her first major performance since her Circus Tour and bitch was H-O-T!

She can't quite move like she used to but with her knee surgery we can cut her some slack on that shit.  Brit still has her IT factor in spades and she drove the massive crowd wild.

After a short montage of her greatest hits, the 29-year-old icon took the stage in a silver one-piece and performed the track Hold it Against Me.

In between songs she announced she is going on tour with Enrique Iglesies this summer.

Brit Brit then performed Big Fat Bass and 'Till the World Ends and by the end of the latter her dancing was much better so I'm going to chalk up her slow start to nerves.

At the end of the performance she was presented a plaque designating today as Britney Spears day in San Francisco.  She looked truly surprised and happy.

Good for Britney!  Femme Fatale indeed.

UPDATE:  What is this horseshit?  Billboard.com is now reporting that he is NOT going on tour with Britney.  No reason was given.  Whatevs dude...Brit Brit will do just fine without you.

Image Via www.musicjuzz.blogspot.com

Brit Brit's Ex-Bodyguard Claims He Has X-Rated Pics of Her

Oh gimme a break!

That mouth breather, that - a little while back - brought a suit against Britney Spears for sexual harassment now claims he has some raunchy pics of the pop star in compromising positions.

Fernando Flores, her ex-bodyguard, had filed a multi-million dollar suit back in the good old days (and by good old days I mean 09-10 when Britney was all bat shit crazy) citing that the star had shown him her coochie several times and now he's saying there are pictures she also sent him of said coochie.

Puh-lease.  I call bullshit.  Where the Hell were these pics a year ago, amigo?  A source says Flores has said the pictures would "...likely shock and disgust the majority of her fans".  

I'm a fan of the crazy bitch and ain't nothing that could come out that would "shock and disgust me" at this point.  We've all seen her crotch at this point, dude.  Keep up!  Should we all sue her for harassing us?

Didn't think so.

Image Via www.therowboat.com

Britney Spears Drops New Video

Britney Spears released her new video, Hold it Against Me to a crap load of anticipation and it didn't disappoint. 

Britney 2.0 has been MIA for a little while now so her fans were all about this shit droppin'.  Directed by the same dude who did Telephone, it's pretty visually stunning.  Think bad acid trip...

Go on, girl!  She's looking good even though she's a prisoner of her own life, maybe they'll let her out of her cage soon...

Free Britney!

Image Via www.illvibes-dmv.com