NY Post Says Snooki is Knocked Up

Oh shiz!  Snooki is going to procreate!  Best mother ever!  *Rolling eyes right outta my head*

About an hour ago, the NY Post reported that Snooki "lied" in previous interviews when she said she wasn't knocked up and IS indeed carrying a future Ed Hardy wearing guido (or guidette - god help us all) in her pickle-filled belly...

This...concerns me.

They report that she's about 3 months along and that the baby daddy is Jionni LaValle NOT the questionably homosexual Situation.  Apparently MTV is freakin' out because they like their Snooki drinking!  Or drunk!  Or pissin' herself on a dance floor!  Mothers can't do that shit - People will crucify her!  A source also told the Post that she has already brokered a deal with UsWeekly to announce the pregnancy - hence the reason she's keeping her chunky monkey booze hole shut.

They said she wants to be the next Kourtney Kardashian.  Who says that?  Assholes say that.

As of right now, I'm totally buying this story.  I can tell she's just itching to trap Jionni with a little bastard kid and I'm pretty sure she has nooo idea what it's like to have a baby.  For realz!

Jionni needs to keep 911 on speed dial for when she tries to hot tub and "get her club on" with Snooki Junior.

Meatball problems indeed!

Image Via www.mcgreg28.hubpages.com

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