7.27.2011

Crystal Harris Tells Stern Hef's a Two-Second Bang


Ouch!  No need to go there, dickhead!

At a recent appearance on the Howard Stern Show, Crystal Harris gave some insights into her relationship with Hef and they are just MEAN!

Keep in mind that the icy bitch has been on a PR rant to showcase her (ahem) music career and to tell her side of the story and has since been pretty classy about it.  Also keep in mind this is the same ho that partied it up with talentless Heidi Montag one day before the ditched wedding AND who attempted to sell her $90k wedding ring.

When asked about Hef and her sex life Crystal said on air that the one time she banged the Playboy mogul it lasted "like two seconds."  Yeah?  Well he's, like, 100 years old so go fuck someone else if you don't want to feel his old balls on ya for two whole pleasure-lacking seconds!  Sure she'll ride the Playboy name for 5 months but she won't ride him for at least half a minute!

"Then I was just over it," she told Stern.  "I was like, ‘Ahhhh.’ I was over it I just like, walked away. I’m not turned on by Hef, sorry.  He doesn’t really take off his clothes. I’ve never seen Hef naked."  Over it?  I hope the Playboy staff pissed in her Cheerios every morning!

Hef was pretty ticked off she gave an interview that made him sound like a sucka so he took to the twitterverse to speak out...

"Crystal did a crazy interview with Howard Stern today that didn’t have much to do with reality. Is she trying to impress a new boyfriend?"  (This tweet was later removed.)  He also wrote in reply to a follower, "Crystal convinced me that she adored me, That was the first lie."  Awww!  You shouldn't lie to old people!   They're...old!

Hef also tweeted, "I feel sorry for Crystal.  She seems lost."

It's okay Hef!  Screw that ho!  She'll be dropped out of the bottom of the porn barrel in about five years and you'll STILL be the man!  Team Hef!

Image Via www.stupidcelebrities.net

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