Showing posts with label Slade Smiley. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slade Smiley. Show all posts

8.16.2012

Alexis Bellino on Buying Followers - It Wasn't Me!


Lol - Ooookay...

I don't mind Alexis - she comes off a little duuuh at times and she is definitely materialistic - but whatevs...there's worse things than being superficial.

Lately, Bravo's "ladies" of the Real Housewives have been under fire for buying twitter followers.  This has been backed up by using twitter monitoring sites which show irregular jumps in followers.  I'm talking super irregular jumps...like when Jesus Jugs gained 30k in a day.

Former bestie Gretchen, her man Slade and Tamra jumped all over that shit and even put her on blast on twitter and on Slade's radio show (which by the way is surprisingly good - Go on, Slade!  I ain't hatin'!)

Alexis (never one to keep her trap shut) took to Fox News (this is soooo not news) to give her explanation of the boom in followers >

"Let me be very clear on this issue, neither myself nor members of my team have ever purchased a Twitter fan...What I have learned is that someone else can do this to my account, and it's very interesting how this chain of events has unfolded, and how certain people seem so knowledgeable and opinionated about what is happening to my account."

Translation - those bitches Tamra and Gretchen must've done it!

I'm not really buying it though.  I know Tamra and Gretchen can be psychotic (especially when teamed up) but I certainly don't think they have some sort of nefarious plan to take down Alexis using social media.

I wouldn't be surprised either way though...

Naked wasted anyone?

Image Via www.hauteliving.com

5.25.2012

Slade Smiley Has a J-O-B Now! Actually He Has Three?


This is according to his girflfriend, Real Housewife of Orange County, Gretchen Rossi.  Whoot, whoot!  Sexy corn dogs for everyone!!!

Backstory > Slade has been taking mad heat for the past couple of years over alleged unpaid child support in regards to his son from Michelle Arroyo, Grayson Smiley.  Heartbreakingly, Grayson has been in and out of the hospital since he was six with a rare form of brain cancer making the story all the more juiced up.

The fact that he has seemingly remained unemployed for long periods of time in the duration and spent countless hours on Gretchen's arm on red carpets hasn't helped him in the court of public opinion and has actually really angered some and resulted in Gretchen having to help him out when "he needed it."

Now it would seem homeboy has a few jobs!  And nooo comedian isn't one of them...(Seriously, WTF was that Improv shit about?  Yikes!)  Gretchen wrote >

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When I asked her what jobs she DMd me >

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So according to her - he's doing much better job-wise and trying to take care of his bizness.  Personally, I think (if it's true) it's great!  I'm not the biggest fan of these two but I'm not a hater either.  I like them waaay more this season than previous ones, I can tell you that.

There's only one thing I find a little unsettling...

Slade posted this in reply to a viewer on his Youtube channel when they questioned why Gretch would still be with him a few weeks ago:

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Yeah, something about that middle paragraph is all sorts of sketchy to me...does he work for Gretch then too?  Or is she working for him?  "Where do you think her make-up and handbags and music all come from?" he asks?  SKETCH!  SKEEEETCH!

But what the hell do I know?  It's hard as all shit to get a straight answer out of anyone on these shows.  All backtracking, scheming and hyperbole...

S'alotta smoke and mirrors, you know?

Image Via www.confabulate.com

5.22.2012

Slade Smiley is Suing Kathy Griffin? - VIDEO


I don't really know what the fuck this shit is but here's a video of "comedian" (lol - yeah right buddy!) Slade Slimey threatening to fake sue Kathy Griffin.

It's not funny at all and I'm not sure why he made it but Phaedra's in it and she's one of my fave housewives so...

That's something?  (Not much of something...)

Check it out >



Get a job, dude!  FACK!

Image Via www.youtube.com

3.30.2012

Slade Smiley Nailed on The Red Carpet By a "Bill Collector" - VIDEO


Whoa!

This is crazy!

A "bill collector" on the red carpet last night approached Slade Smiley and Gretchen Rossi and let the alleged deadbeat dad have it!  He went at Slade tooth and nail about moneys owed to Michelle Arroyo for their son Grayson who is very ill with cancer.

Check it out >



Ouch!

UPDATE:  Gretchen just commented on twitter about the incident:

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It goes on and on defending Slade.  Personally, I've seen some pretty shady court papers on the matter that do verify Arroyo's stance however, I'm not about to act like I know the full story here.  Either way, it's an ugly mess with a sick little guy in the middle and I do hope they can resolve these issues for Grayson.

Title Image Via www.ranker.com
Post Images Via www.twitter.com

3.21.2012

Gretchen Rossi Talks Tamra Barney on CNN - VIDEO


God knows why she was on CNN...The hell?  The real news must've completely stopped there for a hot minute or something...

Anywho, here's Gretchen Rossi in all her blonde glory yakkin' it up about the recent rumor that Slade leaked out about Tamra Barney's engagement to bathing partner Eddie Judge being fugazi.

Gretch basically says that TMZ and Fox News made the whole thing up...why?  For some real big, real Housewife ratings, that's why!



And exsqueeze me???  But what's this part of the vid where she says she "didn't even know" that Slimey Slade was going to propose all about???  They've been talking about it for two fucking years!  She asked him to do it in front of her family once on screen...

Gah!  Like watching the sun rise...

Image Via www.cnn.com

11.28.2011

The Real Housewives Rejects - Where Are They Now???


Ever wonder what happens to a Real Housewife when Andy Cohen gives them the heave ho???  (Emphasis on the word ho.)  Well, wonder no more nosy people!  I've got the goods broken down by show and though some of them are doing just fine and dandy, others have been dealt a much shittier (and much less glamorous) hand...

Real Housewives of OC

Kimberly Bryant was an original gangsta on OC but left after season 1.  She moved to Chicago with her family due partially to health issues stemming from skin cancer though the OC Register ran a story about Scott Bryant being sued for battery (against a woman!  ACK!) at a party that seemed to be the real reason for the departure - who the hell really knows?  Bryant still lives in Chicago, and other than some charitable appearances and guest spots on the show, stays far from the spotlight.

Slade Smiley's ex, Jo de la Rosa, got a record deal from her singing on the show in season 2 (yeah right) with Immergent Records and her first album Unscripted was released in the Summer of 2008.  She told everyone that she was "...back in the studio working on her second album" and that "...her new single, 'A Good Thing' [was] due to come out in Spring 2010 with a brand new music video!!!"  It hasn't come out yet and it would seem her music career is now as defunct as her website.

In 2008 Jo played a "busty secretary" (lol) in a web series called Squeegees that aired online only and was in a movie called Changing Hands in 2010 where she played "Unaware Victim."  Check out the trailer - it's a fucking hoot!  Doesn't even look like a real movie!  She's not in it but for some effed up reason Kevin Sorbo is!  Other than all that, word on the street is that she is a waitress/bartender at a karaoke bar in or around Anaheim.

And oh yeah, on a reunion episode of RHOC, Gretchen Rossi admitted that Slade Slimey and his buddy (Jo's producer) talked her into buying De La Rosa's non-selling music catalogue (probably so he could collect a big fat check.)  Shady, shady...Movin' on!

Lauri Waring Peterson was on the show for 3 and a half seasons before leaving due to family obligations and basically her family life is just a big ol' mess.  Her son Josh is in and out of jail on drug charges (though as of 2012 it looks like he's married now with a baby), hubby George has a son who is also in trouble most of the time, his ex-wife (and Dennis Rodman's ex-girlfriend) Gina Peterson has come out publicly (and on YouTube - check that link out - it's crazy!) about George being a scumbag who's responsible for the alienation between her and her 4 kids with him and there was even some weird fake kidnapping thing with George's youngest Bria.  Other than her hectic private life, it seems a book is in the works for the former reality star.  She is still with George and living in Orange County.

Quinn Fry lasted only one season on the show but still shows up in the background every now and then looking like a dumbass.  She was last seen attending that nasty finale party this past season where Tamra Barney threw a drink in Fry's BFF Jeana Keough's shocked face in an explosion of reality TV awesomeness (wearing that damn blonde wig no less!  Burn that shit already!).  She claims she never knew why the show dumped her ass and that's probably true (Bravo NEVER states why these women are cut loose) but has always alluded that the other housewives basically voted her Christian behind off the island - some blogs say she angered viewers with her preachy 'tude - watch out Alexis! 

Best I can tell, she's stayed out of the spotlight since the show and lives in Balboa with her son Colin.  She is single (according to her Twitter) and works as an internet marketing manager.  She is still very close friends with Keough as well as Tammy Knickerbocker.

Speaking of Tammy Knickerbocker, she left the show after season 3 largely due to the passing of her ex-husband Lou Knickerbocker and the effect that his untimely death had on her two daughters.  After the show she started an entertainment company called Veriya.com that has since disappeared and she also did some marketing for Vicki Gunvalson's Coto Insurance.  Tammy started a charity called Housewives4Housewives which seems to have gone tits up as well and now all she tweets/talks about is some weight loss program called Final Inches.  She appeared in a spot for them in March and I'm thinking she works with them in some sort of branding capacity.  No other recent info could really be found on her though Quinn tweeted she lived near Tammy so she is located somewhere in the Balboa area.

Megan is apparently in nursing school and no word on what Lindsey is up to - she appeared in a video for hair removal so maybe she's still trying her hand at modelling.  Here's a recent pic from thedirty.com of Tammy and Megan and some pics of Lindsey getting her party on with some assorted skanks - including Lou's girlfriend assistant Christen from the show.  

Jeana Keough bounced in season 5 when shit started getting ugly!  She was quite vocal about her flailing real estate business and ended up moving on to another show on Bravo, Thintervention.  Keough reappears sometimes on the show and of course her nosy ass was the target of that damn aforementioned drink thrown at the finale party by Barney.  Her hots for relationship with Barney's ex-husband Simon has been what has kept her somewhat in the toxic mix though I don't think we'll be seeing to much of her on season 7.  According to her facebook page she is still in real estate and is dating Simon someone.

Kara Keough graduated from college, moved to Florida and is dating Jacksonville Jaguars Linebacker and UCLA graduate Kyle Bosworth.  Shane was released from the Kane County Cougars last year, lives in the OC and sells wedding packages from his mother’s Coto de Caza home (she rents out her home for weddings to make some extra bank.)  Little Colton Keough was selected in the 49th Round of the 2010 Major League Baseball Draft by the Seattle Mariners.  He will play for them in the 2011 season.  

Lynne Curtin was ousted after season 5 but showed up more than once in season 6 - she also made a bit of a surprise appearance in the lost footage episode where she tore Gretchen Rossi a new one for her bullshit line of handbags.  She was replaced by Peggy Tanous (again reason unknown) but methinks those bratty little bitches, Alexa and Raquel may have had something to do with it.  Those two were a lawsuit waitin' to happen!  Lynne is still hawking crap online via her website and though she had mentioned that she was going to have a new show when she got the axe, nothing appears to have happened with that.

The aforementioned bratty little bitches have only been seen on the internet in some gnarly pics (PS - that's just one of many) on thedirty.com being nekkid and looking stoned out of their minds.  There's even a YouTube vid (isn't there always?) of Raquel acting a drunk fool online.  According to Raquel's facebook she is designing purses for her mom between raves (people still rave?) and Alexa seems to be unemployed and out-slutting her sister seems to be her only hobby.

UPDATED 06/06/12:  Lynn announced that she and Frank will be divorcing after 20 some years...She is the one who wants to file and he seems against it.  Check it out here.

Peggy Tanous of season 6 is a non-returning housewife for season 7 after being showered in a season of negativity from Jesus Barbie, Alexis Bellino, herself.  Girlfriend held her own though...letting Alexis know that she was riding Jim long before she was.  Though it's not totally clear if she left or didn't receive a comeback card from Bravo (she says the former and Bravo hasn't commented) she will be missed - Like Lynn Curtin, she was a little bit of calm amongst a shitload of crazy.  She was in the premiere episode of season 7 - it smells like a "friend of the Housewives" type sitch, a la Dana Wilkey, personally I hope she keeps reoccurring.  She's good shit, that one.

Real Housewives of New York

Bethenny Frankel is the only Housewife MIA from New York and thank god she got the fuck out of there!  Jesus Christ!  That last season was so...ANGRY!

No secret where Bethenny is - she's on the goddamn cover of Forbes magazine.  She has her own spin-off on Bravo called Bethenny Ever After and is living the high life after making uber-millions on booze, books and her boob job.  She lives with her husband Jason Hoppy and her daughter Bryn in Manhattan.  She is starting a skin care line and also has a line of Spanx ripoffs.

Frankel is also generally responsible for making Jill Zarin and Kelly Bensimon's peeny heads explode with jealousy on a daily basis.

UPDATED 12/25/12: Bethenny Frankel and superhubby Jason Hoppy will be divorcing after about 2 years.  They have only the one daughter Bryn and from what I've heard a pretty airtight prenup.  No Skinnygirl money for you Jason!

In 2011 Bravo made a bold ass move after the reunion from hell and fired FOUR housewives - something unheard of in the series.  Probably Possibly due to just too much bad behavior, Queen of Mean Jill Zarin, her sidekick crazy Kelly Bensimon, teeth-obsessed Cindy Barshop who may or may not be a broke ass now because of her firing and poor Alex McCord who seemed to just get caught in some crazybitch crossfire.  This was the largest firing en masse and should serve as a cautionary tale to the likes of Nene and Teresa...Bravo only puts up with so much crazy before you're replaced.  And make no mistake - you ARE replaceable, Andy don't care how rich you are, bitch. 

Real Housewives of New Jersey

Dina Manzo peaced out after that crazy bitch Danielle's attempts to drive her batty almost worked.  Post gong show at the Brownstone (remember that shit?  Where Danielle showed up with Hells Angels guys and that goomba Danny called Chris Manzo a faggot?  Holy contain the fuckery, woman!) Dina decided it was in her best interests to leave the show before Danielle had the chance to skin her and wear her like last year's Versace.  No word on cute little Lexi - after the allegations involving Staub though - methinks Dina just wanted to keep her faaar away from any of the mess.

UPDATED 06/02/13:  Dina announced a December separation from Tommy Manzo (Co-owner of the Brownstone and Albert Sr.'s brother) on twitter.  During this time she also landed a scripted TV show Tainted Dreams which has yet to be picked up.

Prostitution whore AKA Danielle Staub was fired (though she insists she quit) from the Jersey series last year after two seasons of REALLY CRAZY shit!  She left for two new shows and has yet to hit success with either.

Wealth TV (which is apparently a station, who knew?) picked up a show called Social (that's creative - pfft) which is in the vein of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.  She plays a cuckoo, thinner, more orange Robin Leach who tours the homes of a bunch of no name celebrities.  The show suffered crappy ratings and it's unclear if it's going to be back on the non-station for another season.  She managed to find time to release two sex tapes and fight a few court battles in the meantime - one of which was brought on after she signed a stripping contract with Scores Clubs and reneged almost immediately after citing psychological issues.  Staub's crazy, criminal ass is now on VH1 on a failing show called Famous Food with has been Heidi Montag and professional whore Ashley Dupre.  She also "sings" and pretended to be a lesbian for a while but I'm not even going to go there...

Christine Staub is still modelling and Jillian (that poor kid!) is still being steamrolled into being a pop star.  Danielle even recently said that she had a song in the works with Justin Bieber - but that's obviously so fucking NOT true I can't even believe I'm writing it.  Jillian's father Tom Staub is fighting to gain custody of little Jillian because his ex-wife is fucking crazy he is worried about her and hopefully he wins - Jillian (and Christine mind you) deserve a better life.

Danielle Staub has since become a dial-a-star member but apparently it didn't work out too well because she's just filed bankruptcy...Ruh oh!  

Real Housewives of Atlanta

DeShawn Snow was recast almost immediately after season 1 of the Atlanta show allegedly because she wasn't ghetto enough was a snoozefest with a capital suck and I'll buy that - she was just a spoiled wife who sadly turned the other cheek to her husband's affairs.  After she was let go, Eric Snow left her for his pregnant mistress and she lost that fucking huge house they built and moved into on the show.  Meanwhile, her cousin was charged with stealing over $150k from the couple making it a pretty crap year for Miss Snow.

Oh and remember the pastor she was all about writing all those huge checks to because he was going to get her rich ass into heaven?  Yeah, well guess who turned out to be a the biggest piece of shit ever???  Turns out the pastor used the money given to his parish to seduce young men in the church with cars and jewelery.  Pedophiles make me SICK!  I hope he rots!

Snow's charities she was always harping about on the show are MIA on the internet and according to a recent US Weekly article she is looking to try her hand at scripted TV and hasn't closed the door on reality programming.  Good luck with all that lol.   

Lisa Wu Hartwell is also gone from the Atlanta series and is trying to go legit - she just finished a month-long shoot in Philadelphia on a murder/mystery film with actor/writer/director Charles Dutton called Must Be the Music and is also starring in an upcoming play at Ferst Center on the Georgia Tech campus called Stripped.  Hartwell left the show after she alleged many times that they wanted her to script parts of her life to make her character more interesting and she refused.  Only time will tell if she makes it as a real actress.  Her and her hot hubby Ed have since divorced, presumably over money issues, but neither will comment.  I heard somewhere she's now dating Theo Huxtable (Malcolm-Jamal Warner.)

Sheree Whitfield left the show in 2012 because it was allegedly so negative towards women (BTW - word! It's gettin' nasty in Hotlanta!)  Rumors of Kim Zolciak not returning for season five ran rampant when Wendy Williams announced she was fired but Zolciak insisted via twitter she would return for season five.

Real Housewives of Miami and DC

The Real Housewives of Miami should've just gone the way of DC and put everyone out of their misery.  There was some sort of annoying cluck-fest live reunion that basically hammered the final nail in their coffin in their first season...problem was, they had no Snooki-getting-punched moment - other than Christy Rice not paying for a charity event nothing brought any drama - merely yawns.

The Miami installment will be back on nonetheless for a second season - Andy tweeted he had faith in it or some such nonsense.  Larsa Pippen, Alexia Echevarria and Christy Rice will not be back but be prepared for a lot of mama Elsa on the new season - Andy really digs her for some reason.

The Real Housewives of DC was the first installment ever cancelled (and they managed to do it in one season no less.)  I imagine it was due to two things: 1) The show was too, for lack of a better word, "highbrow" for the usual Bravo Housewife fanatic and 2) They cast the freakin' Salahis in it - a pair who unapologetically crashed more than one political event and were responsible for basically stealing from charities and companies all the while smiling for the camera like a couple of constipated show dogs.  The formula wasn't there - you had all the drama but no one could relate.

(Note:  Michaele Salahi has since left her husband for Neal Schon of Journey fame and Tareq is suing them for $50 million...BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)

Hell, it may have even just been too "real" for reality TV - and all that served to do is turn off people...and they, in turn, turned off their televisions.

(Last Updated on 06/06/12)


Image Via www.boston.com

10.05.2011

Gretchen Rossi Sings About Slade's "Magic Penis"


Oh.  My.  God.

Gretchen Rossi was on The Playboy Morning Show where she sang this little ditty about Slade Smiley's peen evidently one night when she was "sleeping on Ambien" whatever the fuck that means.

This shit is not right!  It's just not right!  Check out the LINK.

She needs to find better crap to do in between court trials with Jay.  This is ridiculous. 

Image Via www.tvgasm.com

7.13.2011

Slade Smiley's Baby Mama to Enquirer - He's a Deadbeat Dad


What a doucher!

Gretchen Rossi's bitch, Slade Smiley, is being outed again as a deadbeat dad.  This time in the pages of The Enquirer.

Court papers surfaced a while back showing Slade owes more than $150k in child support to one of his baby mamas (yes, there's more than one) making the guy look like a complete asshole.  Didn't help that the son he isn't paying for has a heartbreaking form of brain cancer and could definitely use the moola.

Though Smiley and Gretchen continue to say that it's all BS - Michelle Arroyo (the baby mama in question) - said on the reunion episode Slade doesn't pay shit and is now coming out to the trashy mag to set things straight.

Says Arroyo, "My son’s father, Slade Smiley, IS a deadbeat dad...I just want Slade to do his part as a father...We’ve been living with my sister for the past four years. I can’t work because of his [Grayson's] illness."

Slade took a second away from jetsetting with his dingbat sugarmama to defend himself and denied that he was a deadbeat dad and as proof sent the mag copies of two $500 money orders sent to the mother of his son as proof that he pays his child support.   What a fucking moron!  $1000!?!  That won't even buy a pot to piss in as far as poor Grayson's medical bills are concerned.

Slade also said that a $20,000 donation to his son’s foundation was made on his behalf by a production company, but didn’t respond as to whether or not he still owes her $160,000.    

Gretchen said of her man on her Bravo blog, "...I challenge any news outlet, Tamra, or anyone that has balls enough to get the correct information about this support issue out there to ask for proof and documentation regarding payments and contributions to Grayson and his mother. Slade will have no problem disclosing those documents."  Then disclose the damn things!  Until then I'm going by the court papers and according to them, Slade sucks balls.  In dumbass Gretchen's defense though (ugh) I'm pretty sure dude lies to her and tells her he pays the support and that he has a job.   

Arroyo shot back at Gretchen, "I would love to see the documents that Gretchen is talking about...The court records don’t lie.  He needs to start acting like a father and taking some responsibility."

Image Via www.zimbio.com

6.08.2011

Real Housewives of OC - Season 6 Finale Recap


Welcome to the OC, bitch!

We start off with Vicki...oh, Vicki!  What happened to Vicki???  Well, first off her ass bleeding has subsided which is good but what isn't good is that after getting out of the hospital she called her lawyer to serve Donn divorce papers.  Ouch!  Vicki doesn't do shit half-ass people!  Her ass bleeds and she files for divorce!  Booyah!  Suck it!

In this scene Vick reveals Donn ain't talking to her anymore and has cut off all communication since the papers were filed.  I'm surprised she even noticed because Vicki works! Vicki has a job!  Vicki has to work 25-8 and everyone else can either orbit around her bleach blond ass or go scratch.  Did I mention Vicki works?   She has a Job!

Bye Donn - you ruled!

Cut to Tamra and her man candy lawyer boy Eddie...they're getting out their best catfighting clothes to go have a smackdown with Jeana Keough at the obligatory end of the year gathering.  Jeana has been talking shit about Tamra in the press and pissing her off...and boy is she pissed off!  She told them that Tamra hit Simon instead of vice versa because she is clearly sleeping with Simon can't talk to the press due to a gag order of some sort.

We then go to Gretchen and Tubba Wubba in bed eating Lasagna.  What's this???  Gretchen has been giving Slade crap about him being a fatass all season but she feeds him carbs in bed?  Such an asshole.  Anyways, she brings up that jerkoff move of hers to bash ass bleeder Vicki when her ass was bleeding and says she was upset because of the ladies not being there for her fake fiance Jeff when he was in the hospital so she projected that onto blasting Vicki and her ass bleeding.  Dude!  Not cool!  Ass bleeding!

Now we head on over to Jesus Barbie's newest McMansion...

Here Alexis' token gay is helping her pick out one of her super slutty dresses to wear to the s-ho-wdown.  And BTW I don't know who the hell told these bitches that it is okay to wear satin prom dresses everywhere they go but whoever it is should be shot!  But I digress...she decides on a slutty orange one over the slutty blue one and with a tiny cameo from Taliban Jim Bellino and a few digs at the other gals for getting divorces - they're off.  Actually before they're off, Jesus Barbie sticks her foot in her mouth a few times quoting her stupid Bible nonsense.  Apparently, she's made from Jim's rib - whatever.  I always find it's best to hit mute when you see Alexis take the screen anyway, that's a quality tip.

Now we're back to Tamra and Eddie Spagheddi...in the limo ride to the party Tamra shows sexy Eddie a letter from her lawyer she's going to give to Jeana to "shut the bitch down" - dude, if you hired a lawyer to write the shit up get him to serve it up too!  It would've saved some peeps some cash on drycleaning later...and if I know my Housewives these hos are not as cash rich as they would have the public think - all show and no go.  Anyways, Eddie boy tells her to stay cool.  He's not just succinct!  He's Sexcinct!  See what I did there? 

So, now the party, let the games begin!

Not since naked-wasted-gate has an OC Housewives ep come to such an exquisite shitstorm of reality beauty.  This shindig starts off all right but goes sooo wrong!  Tip to ass bleeding Vick, next time try to not invite mortal enemies to the same party...might turn out better.  Oh and PS - Quinn Fry is there lookin' a damn fool wearing that piece of shit Roxy wig she used to ho it up with that prick Billy in Vegas season 3 - what the heck is that about??? 

Anyways, first enemies up to bat are former partners in augmented crime, Alexis "Jesus Barbie" Bellino and Peggy "New Girl" Tanous.  Ding, ding, ding!  Though Peggy starts the argument, Alexis is the one who completely fucking snaps like that busty Teen Mom used to snap on that fat bastard Gary!  Methinks Lex is still a little pissed about Peggy banging Jim back in the day.  Never got over that, never will.   

They fight about lip injections and who has the biggest fake tittays or something (hard to make sense of it when they yell like they're on Jerry Springer) and after exchanging some jabs Alexis floats away on a cloud of ignorance and denial...praise Jesus (Barbie), Hallelujah!  They're all effin' crazy if you ask me!  That was nothing though...

Now for the main event!  Jeana and Tamra come head to head finally and Jeana tells her that the press twisted her words.  Blame it on the editing, right?  Now try to keep up here...

Tamra, practically foaming at the mouth, starts screaming and swearing like a damn redneck because Jeana is all up in her Kool Aid and Jeana goes all sarcastic pushing her over the edge!  She throws the "insist and decease" letter (LOL - friggin' Housewife language!) right in Jeana's face!  Oh snap!

Jeana, in turn, tells Tamra she'll throw her skinny ass in the pool and Tamra takes that as her cue to throw her Skinnygirl margarita in Jeana's fat, nosy face!  ACK!  Bad day for Jeana's face!  Jeana, not being able to see because her retinas are swimming in booze, haphazardly chucks her drink but by then Tamra is gone and she hits some random trashy chick in a cleavage-heavy blue prom dress instead.  So what's a random trashy chick to do?  Why, push the bitch of course!

After Jeana gets shoved (pretty hard BTW) her token gay throws ANOTHER drink on random trashy chick...What the eff?  I feel bad for this innocent bystander and her "$1500" dress!  She didn't
do anything!!!  Collateral damage in a Housewife dimension...  

Jeana takes off in a flurry of "fuck yous" and "no one likes you" reminiscent of my grade school days and Tamra follows her to the driveway.  They shout profanities at each other for a minute and Jeana's gay (the guy who threw a drink at bystander trashy chick) throws a wine glass onto the driveway shattering it into a million pieces just like Vicki shattered Donn's beautiful broken heart!  Jeana goes home (where she belongs) and calls Simon crying.  Who does that???  Man, some people should've been swallowed by their mothers!

Tamra tells everyone who missed the action that Jeana was attacking her first which isn't true but whatevs, I'm Team Tamra so let's just go with it, and Gretchen jumps in and points out that that's how Tamra treated her so she should recognize, yo!  Sooo not the time, dumbass!  But Gretchen, though a tool, isn't the sharpest one in the shed...They both agree to move on for the fiftieth fucking time but cut to Gretch in interview and she says the opposite.  She's such a fucktard!  GET OVER IT!!!  PS - check out www.thedirty.com Gretchen Rossi Scam pages for some GOOD dirt on this ho!

Now for the title cards...

Gretchen was recently spotted trying on wedding gowns.  She left without buying...or leasing one.  Friggin' Bravo -tricky, tricky...

Tamra introduced Eddie to her younger kids, and her divorce is almost final - thank god for that!  Can you say toxic???

Briana moved back in with her spinster mother and still talks to Donn.  Awww!  I LOVE DONN!  Vicki's divorce proceedings continue and her mega mansion is up for sale for $2,695,000.

Alexis' card mentioned the Jim dating Peggy thing but alleges that she insists they are not in competition and Peggy continues to live a healthy lifestyle avoiding prescription drugs, junk food and...Alexis.

The reunion rumors are already running rampant with news that Donn will Skype in to bash Vicki, Jeana will show up and cry and Andy will wet his pants like a little girl while watching the whole shebang go down...Also, the ever classy deadbeat dad Slade will be on the couch! 

Image Via www.suite101.com

5.24.2011

Slade Smiley's Paintings For Sale

Image Via www.allstarpics.net

Much like Tubba Wubba's dignity and soul his paintings are apparently for sale now!  Well, look out Van Gogh!

In a recent ep of the Real Housewives of Orange County bitchboy Slade Slimey gave Greedy Gretchen a bigass picture of herself that he painted to hang in the house that Jeff bought because he is broker than Octomom and had no means to buy her anything that cost actual money.  It was supposed to be sweet and meaningful but just came off as a commercial for Slade's new "career" and only really succeeded in making Gretch look like a stupid sucker again.

Well, he is auctioning off some of his paintings now with proceeds supposedly going to Grayson - please, oh God please, let those proceeds go to his sick son Grayson and not towards another Palm Springs trip!  (These two schmucks have been caught up in shady charity work before.)

Anyways, below are a few of his purty finger paintings and the auction is at Gretchen's hair salon (lol - okay) on July 14th for those of you interested in a Slade Slimey original.  It's probably a good idea to write the cheque directly to Grayson's charity though to avoid any "confusion" and/or to prevent the money from putting a ring on Gretchen's bony finger. 

High Fashion
Bono
Grayson
Gavin


Gretchen The Golden Monkey
High Fashion
Images Via www.stooopidhousewives.com

4.17.2011

Gretchen Rossi Being Sued By Former Make-Up Artist/Business Partner - UPDATED


Oh snap!  This girl is mad!  Like, lawsuit mad...and that's pretty mad.

Gretchen's make-up artist RonAnn Myers (the one featured in season 5 of The Real Housewives of Orange County) is PO'd that the pretty blonde has cut the bitch out of the picture in a business deal...O-U-T!

Myers has since launched a $100,000, 37-page lawsuit naming Gretchen Rossi and Slade Smiley as the defendants.  Some of RonAnn’s claims include, 'breach of oral contract’, ‘fraud/deceit’ and ‘fraudulent conspiracy’.

Myers claims in February of 2009 after she mentioned she was planning her own makeup line, ‘Wiinks’, Gretchen ‘expressed an immediate interest’ in becoming her 50/50 business partner.  Agreeing to ‘pool their resources’, Gretchen and Myers each deposited $5,000 in a joint business bank account.  Myers says Gretchen cleaned out the account without informing her.  She also claims that in February of 2009, Gretchen and Slade Smiley ‘unilaterally moved to change the name of the makeup line’ eliminating ‘Wiinks’ and essentially cutting her out of the loop negotiating a deal with Lady Burd Cosmetic’s New York office without her.

Shady shit!

UPDATE 23/04/2011:  And it just got shadier!  Gretchen's rep released this statement:  "Please note Gretchen has not been served and her attorney's have not been contacted regarding this. It is apparent it was designed specifically for press. Please also note Ron Ann Myers has been selling random cosmetics to her clients for years. She claims to have a make up line that never took off. She is just one more greedy person trying to attach herself to other people's hard work."  Um what?  Last season, the Housewives show focused on this as part of Gretchen's storyline!!!  Myer's sure seemed involved then!  Crazy to pretend she's just looking for press!  Check out Gretchen's statement on her website here.      

Image Via www.absurdtosublime.net

2.13.2011

Slade Smiley is a Douche - Owes $138 Grand in Child Support


There's only three things I hate in this world...pedophiles, Lady Gaga and deadbeat dads.

Slade Smiley falls under the latter owing a whopping $138 K in child support to his son (who may I add has an incurable and very rare brain tumor).

Nice guy, Gretchen, real nice.

His son Grayson just happens to be back in the hospital.  Hopefully Slade at least takes time out of his busy fame whoring schedule and goes to visit the little guy!

He's been busted recently driving on a suspended license (which the judge took away because of his grossly large amount of child support owed), so I'm thinking if this idiot has time and money to drive around in a Range Rover he has enough time to go visit this poor kid.

Gretchen has previously stated that she wants to have 4 kids with Slade (or the highest bidder) so here's hoping he knocks her up, trades her bony ass in for a newer model and stiffs her kids just like she helped him stiff Grayson...not cool guys...not cool.

Image Via www.pedrowatcher.ocregister.com

2.02.2011

Real Housewives of OC is On It's Way


Yeaaahhhh bitches!!!

As a tease for the new season of Housewives Bravo has posted an update on it's site about everyone's favorite OC phonies...

"In the sixth season of the original series that started the hit franchise,Vicki Gunvalson, Tamra Barney, Alexis Bellino and Gretchen Rossi welcome new beautiful blonde, Peggy Tanous, a 41-year old former model and now stay-at-home mom with poster girl good looks. After a tough financial year, the O.C. ladies are bouncing back and living lavishly once more, as the series goes behind the gates for a voyeuristic look at the scandalous truths, mending friendships, rocky romances  sizzling romances, and ever-changing loyalties inside the wealthy Southern California suburb. Tamra also introduces the group to new gal-pal Fernanda Rocha, a 34-year old, hot Brazilian lesbian fitness instructor.

With Simon in her rear view mirror, Tamra is moving forward with her divorce and has a younger, more attractive boyfriend.( Eddie Judge)  Former housewife, Jeana Keough, comes to the defense of Simon by disparaging Tamra in the tabloids, which leads to a big confrontation. Adding more stress, Tamra’s feud with Gretchen has gotten worse and her oldest son, Ryan Vieth , reveals a shocking secret. 

Gretchen continues to build financial independence through her make-up line and is now expanding the business with a handbag collection. Feeling pressure from her girlfriends to take the next step with boyfriend, Slade Smiley, Gretchen doesn’t know if she is ready for marriage again. She knows all the gossip about him being a deadbeat dad, serial-housewife-dater, (Jo de la Rosa, Lauri Waring) and freeloader, and has to weigh this into her decision about their future together.

Alexis still believes that husband Jim Bellino is her king and savior and runs the show,  but also confesses she wants more freedom and independence as a wife and mother. It’s a new chapter for Alexis as she decides to launch a line of sexy and revealing dresses. There is also rumor and speculation that the Bellino’s may be suffering the after effects of the economic downturn with a home foreclosure.

Vicki has built an empire with her insurance business, but her constant drive is having negative results at home. Vicki and Donn are drifting apart and neither one knows how to change it. Will Vicki have to choose between her business and her marriage?

Peggy is an odd mix between a holistic, new age woman and a wealthy Orange County party girl. She believes in clean, natural living, but loves her bling, Bentley and plastic surgery. She sees her new O.C. gal-pals as another step towards being fabulous. During the season, she tries to reinvigorate her former modeling career, but there is more to Peggy than just good looks as she opens up about a dramatic secret."

Oooh!  Secrets!  And not just any secrets...dramatic secrets!  Oooh, it's good.  It's so good.  Can't wait.

Image Via www.suite101.com

11.12.2010

The Real Housewives - My Obsession Began in Orange County…

It started in the OC…in the wake of a boom of Orange County-centric shows like Laguna Beach and of course, The OC.  From there it grew into it’s own monster - they added New York, Atlanta, New Jersey, DC and then Beverly Hills - but I’ll get to those in another blog.

My main man - Andy Cohen is the programming mastermind behind this beast.  As the Senior VP of Production and Programming at Bravo TV, a subsidiary of NBC Universal, he takes spoiled and entitled women and puts them and their family’s lives in a fishbowl for all of us to gawk at, usually pretty slack-jawed.  

I must say, I loooove me some Andy Cohen!  He’s a reality genius…a TV junkie’s heroine dealer.  He is the brains behind Top Chef, Million Dollar Listing, Flipping Out and The Rachel Zoe Project to name a few.  He finally won an Emmy last year for Top Chef, beating out the front runner The Amazing Race for the first time ever.  Too bad he was out getting sloshed with Sarah Jessica Parker or one of his other celeb buddies and didn’t make it to the awards.

The OC started out as a small, cheapo-weapo, reality show.  I remember checking it out in reruns and thinking who the Hell watches this garbage?  Then, one episode at a time, they had me panting for more.  I suppose the one housewife story I was most into was Jo and Slade.  The resident young assholes - Slade loved to talk about how rich they were and Jo loved to talk about how drunk she was.  Ultimately, they broke up so Slade banged one of the other Season 1 housewives Lauri in a feverish attempt to stay on the show.  Then the stupid drunk one Jo got her own reality show spin-off so Slade went back to banging her.

The show failed miserably and basically so did they - both in a bullshit music career and a failed bid at movie stardom.  He now bangs Gretchen, the token airhead on the OC Housewives, who though she is beautiful, may or may not be missing half her brain.  She says things like, “His job is pleasuring me in bed.” when asked about her fake knight in shining armour’s non-job and giggles like an idiot when the other ladies tell her how much of a proven douchebag Slade is.

The other ladies are a bunch of jerks that pretend to be rich and happy until the end of the season reunion shows come, where they fight like tweens.  We'll have to start at Season 5 as it is the most recent.  

Vicki Gunvalson is the only original one left - she’s a cold fish who sits around telling everyone how hard she works while poking the others about how they don’t work.  Boring!  She was married to this dude Donn, who seemed to be the only rational person on the show - but they’ve since gone the way of most reality couples - divorce.  She annoys everyone else on the show with her know-it-all attitude and has since said she may not return for season 6.  

Tamra Barney is a really pretty blond who means well but stirs up shit constantly.  She thinks she’s still in high school fighting to be Queen Bee.  She had a controlling husband Simon who didn’t let her travel alone and basically treated her like snot but alas, that marriage is dunzo too.  She has crazy cute kids who now live with her in a condo since the divorce (they had to sell the house in a short sale.)  Her oldest son has been arrested more times then Charlie “Teflon” Sheen and I‘m sure was one of the reasons her bastard husband left.  As the evil stepson he had constantly been a bane in Simon's existence.  Vicki and Tamra are best friends and team up to torture Gretchen about some seriously messed up shit that played out on season 4 (and in the news) involving some scumbag named Jay Photoglou.  Simon, since leaving, has taken the kids off the show for next season and Tamra has a new guy - Eddie Judge - who seems to be a new sugardaddy of sorts.  Though young and hot he is now taking care of her as Simon no longer could (Simon quit/got fired from his lucrative job at Fletcher Jones to sell fancy booze).      

The aforementioned Gretchen Rossi is a trip!  She thinks she knows what’s going on, but girlfriend doesn’t have a clue.  Still with Slade, amongst rumours they got engaged in the upcoming season, he has turned her into a clone of his precious Jo, without all the hooch.  He even talked the dumb broad into buying Jo’s music so they could still profit off her.  Basically, she’s a gold digger whose wealthy fiancĂ© Jeff, died on the first season she was on.  Now the tables seem to have turned - and she’s the one being played.  I could go on about Slade and her forever so I'll move on.  The main source of conflict amongst these ladies is a feud between Tamra and Gretchen that like I said involves an OC scumbag Jay Photoglou.  The gist of it is that while Gretchen was with uber-rich Jeff apparently she was also with Jay.  After things soured with Jay, he turned to Tamra and Simon (God only knows why) on a mission to destroy the clueless Gretchen.  He called night after night divulging her shadiness in detail to the immature Barney's who in turn got super-pissed at Gretchen for involving them in the madness.  Since, Jay's released some gnarly pics of Gretchen online (mostly to theDirty.com) and they've been in and out of court suing each other over defamation and lies.

Lynne Curtin stands around all day with her hands over her ears singing la-la-la-la, you know?  Like little kids do.  She seems to be fairly stoned most of the time and has been evicted four or five times.  Her two princess daughters say “like” constantly and can barely speak English.  They sound like they speak LA - that mystifying language that Paris Hilton and her cohorts speak.  They were famously evicted on the show after her husband, Jim (I call him Jimmy Cooper from the OC) failed to pay a hefty deposit on their new home.  It was not the first time...seems Jimmy Cooper can't say no you see.  He doesn't say no to his dumbass wife and he certainly doesn't say no to his stupid kids.  Thus, the emperor had no clothes.  He spent money he never really had on plastic surgery and BMWs for his precious family...leading them to embarrassing public debt and reduced them to living in a gasp! condo.  They've since been canned from the show.

Alexis is the new one - according to the sharks on the tabloid sites she is the only one in Housewife history who campaigned her ass off to get on the show.  She’s married to Jim, a shiesty jackass who says nothing more about his career then that he’s an entrepreneur.  Online it says something about him owning pawn shops and there seems to be an indiscretion involving sports memorabilia fraud.  They have three kids they leave with a nanny constantly and won't exactly be winning parent of the year anytime soon.  The 411 on Alexis is that she’s a megabitch who cheated on her first husband and has always longed to be rich and famous; she was also a Maxim Hometown Hottie (barf) back in the day.

The previous housewives (there were 6) show up every now and then in cameos but have generally all just faded into D-list tabloid fodder.  Bravo never comments on why these ladies leave - I’ll certainly miss Lynne's stoned stupidity and underage drunk daughters.  Two new housewives are on the way for season 6 - just more fresh meat for the masses to gorge on and spit out.